Pleated-Jeans
What’s that? Another awful week of work is FINALLY over with?? Great work—you did it!
You deserve some kind of reward. That’s why we gathered up all the funniest blippin’ tweets from the hilarious women of Twitter and plopped ’em down in this list. It’s nothing really, no need to build a statue or anything.
Now go ahead and laugh and scroll and let your bullsh*t melt away, just remember to smash that next page button.
Enjoy!
1.
Made the bed, kept cleaning the apartment, realized I hadn’t seen the cat for a little bit and found him like this pic.twitter.com/ohB7CkmYcM
— Dani Balenson (@dlbee_) February 16, 2020
2.
video game drill sergeant: alright you worthless puke! try using your WASD keys to walk around the room!
me: [walks around the room]
video game drill sergeant: that is out-standing! you’re one of the finest soldiers ive ever laid my eyes on!
— Valentina (@leftistthot420) February 17, 2020
3.
🎶Hiiiiighwaaaay to the 🎶 pic.twitter.com/UgiomE7SSX
— amber ruffin (@ambermruffin) February 19, 2020
4.
babysitting tonight. we were both peacefully drawing. went to the bathroom for 30 seconds.
“i drew her a new face!” pic.twitter.com/3kC8GpYJRs
— tekla 💜✨ (@alketrolyat) February 17, 2020
5.
Everyone thinks they’re tough shit until a little kid draws a picture of you
— Dumb Beezie (@dumbbeezie) February 21, 2020
6.
billie eilish, carly rae jepsen, and miley cyrus should form a pop group called billie rae cyrus
— ___ (@RileyRedRose) February 16, 2020
7.
Due to enormous personal flaws I refuse to work on, I will be arriving 20 minutes late with iced coffee, please respect that
— 1984’s George Whorewell (@EwdatsGROSS) February 17, 2020
8.
whenever someone calls me in the middle of texting with them, it’s like WAIT BUT MY VOICE’S PANTS AREN’T ON
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) February 16, 2020
9.
Every time I go into the freezer I ritualistically sacrifice at least one piece of ice to the kitchen floor gods.
— Aunt Chelle 🌍 🇺🇸 🏳️🌈 (@ravenswng_) February 20, 2020
10.
so funny when people call u back. i was calling u earlier, not now. bye.
— corie johnson (@corietjohnson) February 20, 2020