16.
Enid Blyton knew pic.twitter.com/anE2gKPW3f
— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) May 7, 2017
17.
[during sex]
her: i want you to hurt me
me: your sister’s more successful than you
her: wait
me: not a big fan of the new haircut
her: stop
— Skoog (@Skoog) August 9, 2018
18.
*Wife blows me a kiss from across the room*
*I pretend to catch it*
*I walk over to the window and toss it outside*
“Grow up Karen”
— GoaT FacE (@EndhooS) May 19, 2014
19.
It creeps me out when my dog watches my wife and I have sex. We hide the videotapes, but he always finds them.
— Viktor Winetrout (@Cpin42) January 9, 2014
20.
Birth control pills are like cute little advent calendars for a really shitty holiday.
— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) April 18, 2013
21.
casual sex means you get to wear jeans during it
— samuel (@racetrayter) May 24, 2018