Kate Hackett
Oof — I don’t think adults remember just how much things stick with kids. Once they’re said, they live in a child’s mind … well, forever.
And to make it even WORSE, sometimes it’s the very people who are supposed to love you the most who say the cruelest things. Guys, let me tell you: I hope not one of your parents ever said anything even remotely like some of the stuff on this list.
Get ready to break your heart a few times today…
1. Poor thing
“You’re so annoying.” Said to me as a young kid while I was expressing enthusiasm over some new interest. Later my father complains I never tell him anything.
2. WHOA.
My little brother was drowning, I tried to save him but also almost drowned, we got rescued by a neighbour. My mom told me that they should’ve left me in the pond. I haven’t spoken to her in many years
3. Deserve???
What did I do to deserve a fat kid.
4. Crushing.
After I had rambled on a new, exciting interest, my Dad pulled me over to stand in front of him.
“Here is a quarter. I want you to walk on down to the Snappy Mart. When you get there, put the quarter in the phone. Then call someone who cares.”
He gave me the quarter and I broke down, because ten year old me didn’t have anyone to call. I’m still convinced my being interested in anything makes it worse. I Can still hear his cold, sarcastic voice in my head.
5. Mom called him dad’s name
My parents divorced when I was young and they hate each other. My mom would call me my dad’s name when she was really upset. What makes it worse is that I confided in her that I never wanted to be like my dad. She used that ammunition against me
6. No one would WHAT?
Dad when I was about 10, “If I kill you, I can make another one just like you and no one will notice.”
7. And a reply to that last one…
My Mom said this once but replace “kill you” with “give you away”. Hits different when you’re a twin.
8. Joy is wrong
“you can’t even laugh right”
My mom in a weird moment I thought we were bonding. There’s something inherently extra evil when someone tells you your joy is wrong
9. “Just like your dad”
She told me I was acting just like my father when I would get upset. I would just get kinda pissy and sulk. He would go on rampages and scream and hit and throw things. He pushed her down the stairs once. I would never lay a finger on my current partner. The worst part is I look just like him. I was wondering if my mother always expected me to turn into my dad. I prove her wrong every day.
10. Go back in time
When I was ~10 years old, my mum once said “If I could go back in time and make sure I never gave birth to you, I would in a heartbeat”
Never forgot it. Talked to her a about it a couple of times years later and her responses ranged from “That never happened” to “oh yeah and I suppose I’m just the worst mother ever” and finally “yeah but I didn’t mean it, you know that”
Messed me up tho tbh. Another one was “[older sibling] was the only child we actually planned for, the rest of you were accidents.” I don’t think it was intended as an insult, but being told your entire existence was an accident as a child kinda stung.
11. The mirror
I was an only child and lonely. When I asked for a sibling, the response was “if you want to know why we don’t have more kids, go look in the mirror”.
12. Adopted
Not a parent but a grandparent, I was adopted when I was 12 years old (my parents were both drug addicts so I was in and out of foster care most of my life) my adopted mothers father turned to me on Christmas Eve when no one else was around & said “my daughter should have never adopted you, she should have let you stay on the streets where you belong”…..he got nicer as he got older and sicker but I couldn’t find it in myself to forget what he said even almost 10 years later. Went to the funeral for moral support but was indifferent about his passing.
13. An actual funny one
‘Half man half mattress’ my old man when I wouldn’t get out of bed.
Edit: for those asking, he was being amazing and funny. 1990, I was 16 and had to get up at 04:30 for work, he got me up and out the door every morning.
14. Oh no!
Like a half a century ago….My mother and I were talking and the topic of someone’s eye color came up…I forget who. I sincerely asked…what color are my eyes? (they are sort of a grey-green) She looked at them closely and told me…”sort of a shit-brindle”
I still bring that up from time to time
15. “Mistake”
“You’re the biggest mistake I ever made.” – my mother when I was 5. I’m 32 now and it’s been the undercurrent for our relationship ever since, constantly wondering if anything I’ve achieved or struggled for is something she’s genuinely proud of or just relieved to say I wasn’t a total failure on her part.
16. God, I hate this one.
While I went to go inside the the corner store, she stayed behind in the car. Outside the store was a kid that had a crush on me. He grabbed my ass and I bitched him out. My mother saw all this. In the following days and weeks she basically accused me of being a slut, implying that I somehow invited it. She tried convincing my father of this, told her coworkers about it, everything except being a mom infuriated that someone touched their daughter like that.
17. WHOA
I sometimes wish your seizure killed you when you were 2 years old.
18. So sad.
“All your friends will be more successful than you in life”
It turned out to be true.
19. What a cruel thing to say to a kid
“You sound like a pig under a gate.” I was ~10 and working to expand my vocal range. To this day, I stop singing when others are around.
The one that lives rent free though is, “now, find someone else to take care of you.” Thanks for the help, I guess.
20. That is SO AWFUL
That my sister and myself will “never be more than a hole for a man to fuck” we both shrugged this off as kids but as adults we both realize how fucked up that is to put on your daughters view towards relationships with men.
Needless to say we both struggled with setting boundaries in relationships. It took a lot of inner reflection on our parts (my sister and myself) to build self esteem and learn boundaries with men…thanks mom 🙄
