Ruin My Week
11.
“The second day at a new school, my 6th grade daughter dropped another girl who had slapped her at lunch. It was witnessed by school admin but the kid on the ground tried to say that she didn’t slap my daughter first. She said “if I hit her then why am I the one crying?” to which my daughter responded “because I’m not a pussy!”
This was relayed to me by my daughter while she was on speaker phone in the assistant principal’s office. She did not edit her language.” –dpcaxx
12.
“My 3 year old daughter, Abigail, was whining pretty good. I told her to stop, and asked her what she was whining about. She was crying that her new Elsa necklace didn’t turn her into Elsa. When I told her “well, that’s okay. I like Abby” she responded with “NO, I want ABBY head ELSA body.” –cactusflower8
13.
“When I challenged my 5 year old after hitting me, he looked me square in the eyes and said ‘mosquito’.” –bcallas
14.
“Not about me but my mom and my niece. My niece is only seven years younger than me so when she was two or three she would stay over in my room. Anyway she’s over for the weekend and is taking a nap. My mom decides to go check on her and she’s not in bed. Let me tell you a missing three year old is scary. I get called in to help look for her under the bed or something, I don’t remember. Anyway my mom says “[name], where are you?”
From the closet we here this small voice “in here”
We look and there my niece is sitting in the closet with my Halloween candy at her feet. Wrappers all around and a sucker in her hand. While I was fuming that she ate my candy my mom was about to lose it.” –mountsunrise
15.
“3 year old daughter was frustrated with toilet paper not coming off the roll and said “what the f–king toilet paper!?” –thebestonlythebest
16.
“Daughters paint the dog “because he too had the right to change his style”. I try not to laugh… almost made it but when I told my wife I cracked.” –proletarianpanzer
17.
“When my son was two and a half we lived in Florida. It was a hot day so I gave him a popsicle to cool off. It looked good so I asked him “could I have a lick?” He look at me strangely shrugs – and licks my arm.” –Comprehensive-Map502
18.
“When my three year old dropped a toy and said God Fucking Dammit Dave. Goodbye Tiktok. It was nice knowing you.” –thrownwayawaywego
19.
“We owned a small family fast food restaurant. Our little town (pop. 5,000) could barely support us and the city counsel let McDonalds move in. My husband was very salty about it, understandably. So my mom and I were driving down the main drag going past the McDonalds and my 5 year old yells out, “McDonalds tastes like dog shit!” He’d been listening to my husband and repeating what he had heard. Thankfully my mom is pretty cool and we both laughed out loud.” –daisychain0606
20.
“I sent my kids to the bathroom instead of their rooms when in trouble. (I’d lose a roll of toilet paper at the worst..My second was a CRIER. To the EXTREME! I hit a point of ok, he’s needs babied. He was about 3. I went to open the bathroom door to make amends because he CRIED a lot. He’d SLAMMED the door in my face and yelled “I’M NOT DONE CRYING YET!!!” What do you do? Say? Ok let me know then!” –cuzican74
