Kate Hackett
Menzie, a creator on TikTok, has gone viral for recreating toddlers’ big feelings.
In the video below, Menze takes on the role of a toddler and explains through tears what she’s feeling:
“You woke me up early and put me in the jeans that I hate, and the tag is itching my skin, and your breath smells fucking disgusting. Every time you come near me, I smell coffee and I hate it. My molars are coming in, and it hurts like a bitch! You bumped them when you were brushing my teeth against my will — that’s torture. Everything is so out of my control, and I just wanted the blue cup. I know I can’t always have the blue cup, but every time I have feelings you act like they’re so not worth any of your time. If I was OK, then why am I crying? Why do I feel this way? Everything is not alright right now.”
Buzzfeed chatted with Menzie, who is the mom to one boy, about the inspiration for her videos.
“I witnessed something I’ve seen countless times and always hated: an obviously injured, completely inconsolable child being told in a monotone voice, ‘You’re OK, you’re OK’ by an adult who barely bothered to look up from what they were doing.”
Menzie disliked the reaction from the mom so she decided to make TikToks taking on the role of an upset toddler.
“My goal is to showcase how big feelings are a human experience, not just something children struggle with. I don’t want to guilt anyone or tell people what to do. I just want to provoke thought and encourage people to reconsider how they might respond to a person (of any age) experiencing an emotional event.”
In another video, Menze takes on how children feel when their parent tells them to clean their rooms:
“I know you can’t possibly understand, but, in my mind, I was in the middle of something important. I was building a bridge, and now I have to cater to you and your desire to have objects arranged in a certain way. How is that important right now when I’m in the middle of something? I don’t really understand why it matters where things are. Why, if things are in a certain place, I’m in trouble and if they’re somewhere else then you’re happy with me? Make it make sense.”
And then the “I wanna do it myself” tantrum…
“I wanna do it myself. You think that I don’t know that you’re faster and better at everything than me? You can do it better! You’re a million fucking years old! I’m 2. I’ve been practicing all the time — every single day. I just wanna learn new skills so that you will be happy with me. You have no idea what it is like to be so goddamn uncoordinated. I’m growing so fast, like my dimensions are different every month…”
She also shared the feelings and thoughts a toddler might have when getting ready and going out.
“Why are we always rushing around like idiots? I don’t even know what time is. And I’m not very good at getting ready to go places, and you’re apparently not good at getting ready to go places either because we’re always struggling. I know you’re frustrated — I can sense it, and it’s making me frustrated. Is that all life is — just getting ready to go places and then going places? I didn’t ask to be here. I didn’t sign up for any of this, and now I’m just always having to get ready to go everywhere with you.”
And finally, some thoughts on “we have to go” meltdowns.
“What I wish you would realize right now is how much of my time is not spent in this location that I love. This location brings me joy, and I don’t get to be here that often. I’m always somewhere else — with you, doing something else. And now I’m somewhere that I love to be, and you’re telling me to leave? I’m mad at you for that. I don’t wanna leave.”
Menzie’s videos certainly force us to think about what our kids might feel in any situation. And while, sure, sometimes meltdowns don’t constantly need our attention, sometimes it’s an absolutely okay thing to slow down and find empathy.
