Kate Hackett
Man, with a boyfriend like this, who needs enemies…
Can you imagine the guy who is supposed to be your biggest supporter coming in with a statement like “you’d be a bad mother”? u/bobby_ross_ shared a story with Reddit’s AITA sub in which… he did just that.
OP explains that he and his girlfriend have two dogs together.
I (25m) and girlfriend (24f) of 4 years have 2 dogs together. We got them while being together, neither have been from a previous relationship.
Because she wakes up earlier AND works from home (oh man, hold me down…) OP thinks she should walk the dogs. She doesn’t.
My gf wakes up earlier than I do and works from home, so it makes the most sense, in my opinion, that she would take the dogs outside first thing in the morning as I do if I am up before her. But every single time without fail, she makes them wait for hours until they are crying and jumping at the door.
The girlfriend waits for him to do it or, horror of horrors, has THINGS TO DO. These poor dogs.
Or sometimes just doesn’t do it at all seemingly because she is waiting for me to do it. With the excuses “they didn’t ask to go out yet. They’ve just been playing with each other all morning. My boss needed me to do something right away.”
Instead of, say, getting up earlier and walking the dogs, OP scolds his girlfriend. And then layers guilt on top of it! He thinks this is indicative of their future kids… oh honey. I have news.
I’ve talked to her about this so many times, that the dogs are the first priority in the morning and that nothing else should really even be done until they go outside and do their business. She always responds with a huff and a puff and “I know, I understand.” I’ve now started to tell her that what I’m seeing from her towards the dogs makes me think she will do that with our future children. What if the baby needs a diaper change? Is she going to wait until shes had her coffee and breakfast before changing a dirty diaper from the night before? Or just leave it for as long as possible until I end up doing it?
OP thinks she’d be great with kids but worries (I hate him) she’ll neglect them based on what she does with the dogs.
I’ve seen her with kids and she is fantastic, she would make a great teacher but just this one thing is making me question how she would care for our own kids. Whenever I tell her I’m worried that she is going to neglect our children in a way she gets upset and says she never would. But that is not what I am seeing from our 2 dogs that we consider to already be our children. AITA for telling her that and thinking this way?
Maybe some edits would help this story. OP also throws in that he DOES take the dogs on a 2 hour hike before his job.
EDIT: Sorry if this is the wrong way to do it but just some info to add as people are assuming I don’t do anything and expect her to do everything which is my fault as I didn’t include as much information as I could have, my apologies. I did not realize how much information I had left out. We live in an apartment. I work nights and take the dogs for a 2 hour hike before my shift, so I sleep in a bit longer if I can. I am a horrible sleeper so I am usually up before her anyways. So because I am awake before her I am taking them out the majority of the time, but when I can sleep in they are not taken out until I am woken by the whining and I get up and ask if they’ve been out yet and she says she was just about to do it.
He also does, thank god, accept that the comparison to parenting was out of line.
EDIT: I completely understand what you guys are saying about commenting on her future parenting. I shouldn’t have done that thank you for helping me understand that.
“ESH if the dogs belong to the both of you but YTA more dogs are not equivalent to humans downvote me if you want but it’s the truth and it’s even more fucked up that you said this to someone with fertility issues,” wrote another user.
A third said, “YTA. She’s great with kids because she likes them. Doesn’t sound like she wants dogs. I certainly wouldn’t have children with someone who demanded our pets be the first priority, but not actually making them a priority themselves.”
“This makes me nuts. My husband and grown child will not let the dog out first thing. I know I have to pee when I get up. He does too! Same thing when I get home from work. Did you let the dog out? No, he didn’t ask. 🤬did you pee at all today?! Ugh,” wrote in another Redditor.
