Kate Hackett
I kind of loathe that “my girlfriend/wife takes forever to get ready” stereotype. First of all, OH MAN I AM SO SORRY THAT SOCIETY MANDATES WOMEN WEAR MAKEUP AND DO OUR HAIR TO GO IN PUBLIC. What an inconvenience that must be for you!
I generally think that stories about women who take forever are sexist and shitty. HOWEVER. I have also dated men who are constantly late. It’s rude. It’s annoying. And this particular tale definitely got under my “I’m always on time” skin. Let’s take a peek at u/Striking_Still_3721‘s story about his chronically late wife.
I’m a 34-year-old man, and my wife is 29. We have been married for five years.
Since we started dating, she has always taken her sweet time doing everything. Getting dressed, doing her makeup, eating, whatever it is, she takes forever. I’m generally a patient person, but I get extremely anxious when I’m late for something with a scheduled starting time. Alone, I have never been late for anything. With her in tow, I’m late for everything.
OP explains that his wife is always slow. Always late. Always making him late. I can see how that would get old fast.
The most frustrating thing about this is that she seemingly has no ability to comprehend that she’s making people wait. If I even suggest that she move a little faster, she gets really defensive. A few years ago one of her best friends dumped her because she was tired of her chronic lateness.
The fact that this is so bad that a best friend dumped the wife because of how late she always was seems… Uh. Revealing. This is more than “I have to curl my hair”.
Last night, we went out to see a movie. Getting to the mall before the movie started was a battle itself, but miraculously with the prospect of doing some shopping before it, she was able to gather her necessary belongings and get there with time to spare. She started shopping while I more or less followed her, until it was about time to get to the theater. When I told her this, she was talking to a sales clerk about the clothes that she wanted to buy, and she told me to “hang on” for a second.
They went out to a movie and managed to get in on time, but the wife wanted to do a little shopping. Which turned into a little more shopping. Which turned into… them running the risk of being late for the movie.
As usual, “hang on” meant “I have absolutely no concern about your needs because I’m doing my own thing right now and anything other than what I want to do is out of the question.” I waited around for a couple more minutes until she started taking jeans off the shelves to try on new combinations. The previews had already started. I told her again, and she said we can just skip the previews.
OP finally just left. He went to the movie alone, turned his phone off, and had a nice time. When he came out, she was still in the lobby. She was upset and they had a rough drive home.
At this point I just walked away, which she naturally didn’t notice, turned off my phone, and enjoyed the movie myself. As a side note, I missed the first few minutes of it waiting for her, standing in line, and making my way to the theater. On my way out of the theater I saw her on a bench in the lobby beside herself because I ditched her. I honestly didn’t feel bad at all and told her that I’d do it again. This made her more upset, and finally we had an awkward quiet drive home. Apparently she was actually looking forward to the movie too.
Was I the asshole in this situation? I felt it was supposed to be tough love, but she seems really hurt.
So now OP is left to wonder: Am I a total jerk here? Let’s see what Reddit said.
