Kate Hackett
..parents don’t go to prom, right? Like, that hasn’t changed since I was in high school. Parents are not like, invited to prom? Yes? YES??? YOUTHS, AM I WRONG?
Because the title of this Reddit post has me questioning everything I ever knew. u/Extension-Marzipan86 asked, “AITA for my husband missing his daughters prom?” and while I hoped the story would help clear this up… I don’t think it really is? Like, why is this important to parents?
I guess let’s check out the explanation but I still am … ???
OP has a daughter and a step daughter with her husband. She is going on vacation soon.
I 36 female have been married to my husband Josh 40 for 10 years. We have a 9 year old daughter Lauren together and my step daughter Riley is 18.
About a year ago I booked a vacation with my girlfriends for one of their bachelorette parties. It’s this weekend in Tennessee. We leave Thursday and come back Monday.
The weekend of the vacation, her daughter has a competition and needs a guardian with her the entire time. OP’s husband asked to meet the team there but he has to be with her at check in time.
This weekend Lauren has a cheerleading competition that Josh is taking her to. Lauren is required to have a guardian there the whole time and she needs to arrive early Friday and leaving Sunday. We did ask the cheer director if a friends mom could bring her and my husband could meet her there after but they said no. And if she’s not there for the check in time she can’t compete that weekend.
But the oldest girl’s prom is Friday. The parents did not know the date of prom until after the vacation and cheer trip were paid for.
Riley’s prom is Friday. Riley did not have a junior prom and her school only has senior prom. We found out the date of prom after school started and the trip had already been booked and paid for.
Ergo… the husband is going to miss prom. And apparently the stepdaughter is very upset. Because she can’t take pictures with her family.
My husband is now going to be missing Riley’s prom to take Lauren to her competition.
Riley thinks this is extremely unfair and that we’re playing favorites since she’ll never get this chance again and she wants pictures with her dad and sister. She’s been messaging my husband about it.
Lauren doesn’t want to miss her competition and risk her spot on her team.
OP is not going to cancel her trip, fair, but now the husband is throwing a fit.
My husband asked if I’d cancel my trip and I told him no. The trip has been booked, paid for, and I also need a break. He takes breaks and trips as well.
My husband and I are now fighting because he feels like no matter what he does he’s stuck. He’s already told Lauren he’ll be taking her to the cheer comp which means he’ll be missing prom.
So AITA?
In an update, OP explained that she decided to stand her ground. It seems like OP’s husband also came around and tried to use the kerfuffle as a teachable moment and compromise… but his daughter isn’t having it.
I have decided to stand my ground that I will not be cancelling my trip. I will be getting on the plane in the morning.
Josh just sat down me, Riley, and Lauren to talk about the weekend. He explained he’ll be taking Lauren to her competition while Riley’s mother takes pictures with her at prom. He said he taught the girls about commitment and he’s not going to have Lauren’s absence have the team Forfeit.
He told her we could do pictures if she wanted to put her dress on a second time but she said it won’t be the same and she’s upset.
Oh well, kid.
Riley is upset with her father and thinks he’s favoring Lauren.
Reddit pointed out exactly what I said:
“I don’t get why everyone is acting like an adult’s world needs to revolve around prom. I remember who I went to prom with, I don’t remember the hour at my house beforehand where the parents insisted on taking photos. I know for a fact some of the parents weren’t there for the photos, because they had to work or do other stuff. It’s prom, not a wedding or a graduation. Prom is about the kids spending time with each other, it’s not a family event.”
