Guy Moves Out When His Parents Ask For Rent Money And Asks If He Screwed His Family Over

Paying rent to family is a concept rife with issues – heck, mixing money and family in ANY way can cause issues. u/LetterheadMaterial93 summed everything up when they asked if they were wrong for moving out once parents started charging rent. And while it’s in no way unusual, nor is it unheard of to pitch in paychecks to help the family, OP sensed there were better deals to be had.

OP starts by explaining that they earn enough for school and a little savings.

I 23 am the oldest of five siblings and I am a full time student. I also have a part time job in my field but when I complete my after degree my employer will take me on full time. I make enough from part time to pay for school and put money aside. My siblings range from 20-10.

Parents work and OP took on many chores to help around the house.

Both of our parents work full time. I have taken on a lot of the responsibilities for keeping everything running in the house. I do the grocery shopping, the laundry as well as making suppers and doing meal prep so everyone has lunches ready to take every day. I also get all my siblings to do their part with regards to household chores. For example my youngest brother is responsible for feeding and walking the dogs. So I make sure that there is dog food in the storage and poop bags on the leash.

My dad works very long hours and my mom works 9-5 at a hard job.

Over Christmas I had a chance to buy a PS5 for myself so I did. The rest of my family is still using a shared PS4. I keep mine in my room and I do not share.

OP’s parents talked to OP about the complaints and OP pointed out that they were doing a lot of the “managerial” work of the household. The parents decided it was time to pay rent.

My parents started fielding complaints from my oldest brother about how I made so much money and I don’t share the things I buy for myself. Totally true. So they had a talk with me where they brought this up. I pointed out how much of the household work I did and they said it wasn’t fair that o was earning so much money without contributing. They told me how much they expected from me.

None of that was unreasonable; OP ran some numbers and decided they could afford their own place and come out further ahead than if they kept living at home. So they left!

I went to my room and did the math. If I gave them what they wanted I would have about $800 a month left over. If I dropped a couple of classes next semester I could go to almost full time hours with my employer and and it would only be one more year until I graduated with my second degree. But I could afford my own place and I would have way more free time and disposable income.

I packed up and moved out. Everything I owned fit in my car. I stayed at an Airbnb for two weeks until I could get everything sorted with an apartment, school, and work. It was great.

I’m not going to lie I may have gone a little overboard on Tinder. I couldn’t have women over to my parents house.

OP plotted out their work schedule and school. Meanwhile, the household work is now falling to the other siblings.

I just moved into my own apartment. I’m staying part time until I finish this semester. I will work full time over the summer and go to a lighter class load/higher work hours in the fall.

My oldest brother has been tasked by my parents to do everything I used to do. His chores have been split up with the other three. They are all pissed at me for moving out.

And, predictably, the entire family is mad at OP for leaving them.

My parents are upset that I left them in the lurch. My siblings are mad that they all have more chores. My oldest brother is especially salty because he has no free time to see his girlfriend and she isn’t allowed in the house when my parents aren’t home.

I’m enjoying my free time. I bought myself a plant from IKEA.

OP maintains that they feel bad for screwing the family over (they didn’t) but that it made more mathematical sense to live alone.

I feel bad for screwing them all over but it didn’t make sense for me to do all that work and pay rent on top.

EDIT

OP adds that things were fair until they were asked to put money in as well as handle chores. Seems reasonable!

All the chores were split fairly. I wasn’t doing any more than anyone else. I thought it was fair until I was asked to out in money as well.

Reddit knew right away — nope, this person is NOT the asshole.

“NTA If you ‘left them in the lurch’ that should be a flashing sign of how much you were contributing. I was ready to call you an AH but your carrying the entire mental load of the household you shouldn’t be expected to share the money you earn,” said another person.