Woman Asks If She Was Right to Call Police On Her Homophobic Brother Over Pride Flag Theft

We’re only five days in 2022 and we’re still hearing about all the 2021 holiday altercations that had a special guest appearance by the police. (The actual police, not the fun and cool kind with Sting.)

Redditor Acceptable-Sand3229 is one of many people wondering if it was appropriate for them to call the police on a loved one. Granted, calling the police should always come with heavy consideration, which is why people in these situations have gone to Reddit’s Am I the Asshole? subreddit to gain clarity.

In this situation, a woman in a same-sex marriage has to live with a horribly homophobic brother. She sums up the situation in three concise paragraphs.

So for Christmas my mother got me and my wife a pride flag, and we hung it on the outside of our garage. It got stolen a few days ago, but since we have cameras we were able to figure out the culprit was my brother.

This isn’t a huge surprise, I came out at 12 and in the 32 years later and he has been nothing but horrible to me because of that. I decided even so to call him up and ask him to return the flag, I told him that as long as he doesn’t do it again we can forget about it. He refused and said some homophobic slurs, so I called the police and reported it.

He is on probation so he could go back to jail now. He called me and cursed me out saying I’m sending him to jail for stealing a $10 flag. AITA?


This seems to be a justified “straw that broke the camel’s back” situation after decades of verbal abuse. Let’s see what OP’s fellow redditors think.

The majority say OP is not the asshole.

NTA, he played a stupid game and won a stupid prize lmao

only thing is maybe watch ur back with other family members calling you petty, it might cause a bit of a stir if theyre also homophobic.


With some saying that it’s about time this happened, as the brother has been spewing bigotry for decades.

Who cares about being petty to homophobes?

He stole OP’s property. His own actions put him in jail, OP was looking out for herself.

He was a thief to OP, not once but twice. OP give him a chance – a chance that he frankly didn’t deserve – to right his wrongs, but he went through with his hateful actions anyway.

He didn’t go to jail over “a $10 flag”. Things are not that simple. He stole a pride flag from someone he’s always been homophobic to, followed by hate speech. It’s not the flag that landed him in jail, it’s his actions and the hatred he’s been spewing OP’s way for 3 decades.

You’re 100% not the AH, OP. I wish you and your partner the best.


Many Redditors supported OP’s decision in calling the police and gave her encouragement in case she did feel any guilt over her actions.

NTA- he committed a theft which is not on you. Calling the police is what you should of done. Unfortunately he’s your brother and I can tell you’re feeling guilty, and it’s ok to feel guilty, it shows even throughout the past 32 years you still care for him. You’re a good person to feel that guilt, but it’s not your fault, he’s needs to grow up.


With the internet largely siding with OP, we’ve learned our lesson: Be a bigot, face consequences.

You can view the entire post here.