Kate Hackett
u/Routine_Junket1040 popped onto Reddit’s Am I The Assh*le subreddit to wonder if she was the assh*le for “selling my family home because my pregnant [sister in law] ate my dinner”.
…Kind of a wild title already, right?
The story gets increasingly crazy, so I’m going to dive right into it.
I know sh-tty title but I’m in a rush to get to work so excuse my grammar
Also I want to point out me and my brother have two different fathers
I (19f) lost my father last year to cancer he left me 90% of his stuff including his family home that was left to him by his dad it’s been in their family for over a hundred years. My brother (34) and my dad didn’t have a relationship but he did leave him 10k, my mom was pissed at the will reading but since she got 10k she couldn’t do anything about it
OP sets the stage and tells us that she and her brother have different dads; her dad passed away last year and she received a decent inheritance. Her brother, who is not the father’s son, received 10k, as did the mother.
For the past year me and her live ok together. she went on acting like it was her house like before which I had no problem with till in may my brother and his girlfriend (30) moved in (without even asking me)
And for a while, the mother and OP lived together and things were alright… then her brother moved in. With his girlfriend.
They’re messy entitled and rude I told them in July I want them out by September because they don’t pay for anything nor wash a dish In August they announced they were pregnant and my SIL smugly said “guess we won’t be moving out now” It didnt go down well but when I told them I wanted them out my mom and brother basically laughed in my face.
OP told her brother, who was anything but a stellar roommate, that she wanted him and the girlfriend out. At which point, the brother announces that the GF is pregnant and lo and behold, they think they can’t move out anymore. For ?? reasons. OP says, no, go.
Well the past few months have been hell they’ve become worse than before and my mom enables it than demands me to treat my SIL like a princess because she’s pregnant I once had to wait outside McDonald’s till they opened to get her a McMuffin.
And naturally, the living situation soured further.
Well here were I maybe the assh-le Because my SIL is pregnant she eats everything she sees like the cupcakes my friend made me for my birthday she ate all six didn’t even get to try them. I can’t even make my lunch the night before because when I go to get it, it will be gone she’ll have a smug look on her face while rubbing her belly than laugh and say “I couldn’t help my self blame the baby” if I put stuff in my room my mom will open the door with the spare key SIL can go through my mini fridge.
Well a week ago I was running late to collage I didn’t have time for my breakfast or to make lunch and I had to go to work straight after so all I had that day was a bar of chocolate when I got home I was starving I made myself dinner while it was cooling down I went to use the bathroom.
Here we get to the crux of the matter: sister-in-law eats all of OP’s food. And OP was very hungry…
I must of been in there 10 minutes at most by the time I came out she had 70% of my dinner ate and I literally lost my sh-t of course she started crying my mom and brother started screaming at me for making her cry making excuses like how she couldn’t help it and it was my fault for leaving food around her.
And sister in law ate nearly all of OP’s dinner. OP lost her mind, the sister in law said it wasn’t her fault because OP “can’t leave food around her”. What?
Well I had enough I told them get out just like before I got mocked but here’s the thing back in October my uncle offered me a life changing amount of money for the house I called him up crying a few days ago explaining the situation he said he’d buy the house but he will evict my mom and brother. They ofc didn’t take it two well and I have had to stay with a friend I’ve been receiving texts and I’m being tagged in multiple posts on social media. I’m starting to think I’m the bad person now.
In a tizzy, OP called her uncle and offered to sell the house to him. The mom and brother would be evicted under the terms of the deal and OP explains that they didn’t take that news well; she has since been living with friends to avoid the conflict at home.
So AITA for making my mom and brother homeless?
Edit: So I’m on a break I’ll address some things.
If I sell the house to my uncle I will lose 100k but he’s always been good to me and it’s one of those situations were I’d sleep better knowing it’s gone to someone in my dad’s family.
She also follows up with some details: the deal to the uncle is acceptable to her and fair in her mind.
My mom told me because of my age I wouldn’t be taken seriously if I tried to evict them.
Her mom just flat up lied to her.
If I evict them and continue to live in the house along with the high financial costs I don’t think they’d ever let me live in peace.
OP feels she can’t evict and keep living there.
My mom has health issues and my SIL will have to move in with her parents they won’t allow my brother so I’d be splitting up a young family in my moms words
Guys I’m actually crying I’ve never been told before “I’m proud of you” and the fact I’ve seen a thread of comments telling that means the absolute world to me.
OP finishes up by saying that despite Mom’s guilt trip, she’s moving forward with a lawyer.
Edit two: I plan to meet a lawyer and will update you all as soon as I have news also.
Since people are curious, the house is worth 2.5 million it’s in the heart of London.
So what do we think, Reddit? Is she a jerk?
And I’ll leave you with this amazing answer from a Redditor:
I would caution against making a decision as huge as selling a home when emotions are high. It sounds like a solid offer from your uncle, but speak with a realtor to ensure you are getting a fair offer. I would also highly recommend you get a plan in place for rolling the money into a stable investment that will last, whether it’s a home or long term investments. Also consider if you really want to permanently part with your father’s home. You could always evict your brother and rent it out until a time that makes sense to live back in.
Edit- OP states uncle is offering $100k less than estimated worth. This is a hit too large to take in my opinion just to get rid of SIL. If you can’t stand up to them in your own home, are you going to be able to stand up to them when they beg and plead and lay on the emotional manipulation for the cash you get out of the house?
Step 1: you need to lay out some boundaries that will be enforced immediately. SIL doesn’t touch your things or your food. Mom stays out of your room and does not get a key. If anyone breaks these rules, you move toward immediate eviction proceedings.
Step 2: speak with a lawyer and become better educated in eviction law. Be prepared to serve 30 day notice to your brother and SIL, and mom if necessary.
Step 3: brother needs a plan to move out. If he knows you are serious about resorting to eviction, he will figure something out. You are not his only option, you’re just the cheapest one.
Step 4: get a therapist. You need to talk to someone impartial. It sounds like your family has beaten you down for many years. You need to have someone in your court who can help you build yourself back up. This will be impossible to do living in close quarters with ungrateful people who treat you with no respect.
Step 5: figure out what you want to do with your house. There is a lot of space between selling and living with your miserable family. You could rent it out for awhile and live alone in a smaller place. This would actually be my recommendation. You could get away from your family, maintain your home equity, and rent someplace smaller and more peaceful for yourself. No matter what you do, don’t let your mom or brother manipulate you out of your home or earnings from your home. Your father left this to you to build your future. Don’t let them ruin it for you!
