Kate Hackett
People who work weddings are some kind of saints. Like, seriously, everyone involved in the entire process seem absolutely off their gourd in some way. The couple is stressed and not on their best behavior, the parents are demanding…
The list goes on and on. Weddings make people terrible.
And the worst of the worst, arguably, might just be the people who think a wedding is a great time to propose.
u/Significant-Pass-784 works as a wedding DJ and, bless his heart, has seen some terrible behavior. Like the proposal he thwarted in this story he posted later to Reddit’s AITA! Let’s check it out.
OP explains that he works as a part-time DJ for some side cash. Sweet!
Sorry for bad grammar/format I’m doing this on a phone.
So, I (27m) am a part-time DJ. I mostly DJ for just family and friends I’m not really a professional, just do it for a little side cash from time to time.
At a recent wedding, OP got a bit of an odd song request. It changed the vibe of the wedding, but he started playing it.
Last weekend I got invited to DJ on the cheap at a wedding for a friend of a friend. At the wedding while everyone was on the dance floor one of the guests we’ll call him “Kevin” approached me and asked if I could play the song “Golden Hour” It was an odd request because at this time all the guests were literally hoping around and dancing but I was told to take all requests so did it anyways.
The guest who requested the song started to slow dance with his date and then …got down on one knee…
When I started playing it the dance floor started to clear up and then Kevin invited a woman onto the dance floor they started slow dancing for a bit, a few people joined them (including the bride and groom) Then at that one part of the song Kevin got down on one knee and I knew right away that he was going to propose.
OP knew immediately what was going on and was worried he’d be blamed.
I didn’t think it was right especially because they were in the middle of the dance floor with all eyes on them and I kinda felt like if this happened I would take the fault because I was the one to put on a romantic song out of nowhere.
So the second the box came out, OP threw on a wild song and cranked the volume. The tension was palpable.
So instead of letting that happened as soon as he pulled out the box I started to play “BOOGIE” and turned up the volume instead. After that Kevin just side-eyed me and got up and everyone else sat down. After that nothing else really happened and the tension was very thick.
OP went off figuring that he wasn’t the asshole here, but came to learn later that the requesting guest was the bride’s brother.
After the wedding no one really brought it up and I obviously thought that I wasn’t the asshole and the friend that was friends with the bride said that I wasn’t. But then a bunch of the family started to message me.
The bridal family felt that the DJ should not have any say over what goes on at the wedding (fair) and that OP should not have assumed the bride didn’t want that proposal to happen.
It turns out that Kevin was the bride’s brother and the family kept asking why I did that, I told them that proposing at someone else’s wedding was not appropriate. They told me that I shouldn’t have an opinion because I was just the DJ and now Kevin got publicly humiliated because some people knew this was going to happen so they were taking videos and live on Instagram so all their friends could see. I responded with “that would’ve made the newly weds hurt” but then they came back with “You shouldn’t have assumed that the bride didn’t want that.”
Now OP thinks the bride might be mad with him. So he’s not sure if he’s the asshole here.
That part got me thinking because I was mostly communicating with the bride about arrangements and she was very chatty before the wedding but after that she kept give my me one word answers. So I assume she is mad at me but then again when she payed me she almost doubled the amount for what I was asking for with a generous tip? So im not sure if the bride actually knew I think she would’ve told me.
But Aita for just assuming?
OP also noted that he didn’t have a strong indication that the couple appreciated his thwarting of the proposal.
ETA: A lot of people said to ask the bride and groom I did but like I said their answers were vague. Bride said it was fine but it was probably just to spare my feelings. I didn’t want to push because she clearly had a lot on her mind in the moment.
Yep, definitely sounds like the DJ screwed up here. He just overstepped the confines of his job — with good intent, sure, but that just wasn’t his place.
That said, it was pretty shitty of Kevin to throw OP this wrench in the first place.
Reddit tended to agree with me. One user wrote, “If the bride knew this was going to happen and approved it, she should have told you before hand. Going with NTA. Your heart was in the right place. Protect the bride and groom’s day.”
Another Redditor said, “What if the bride was put on the spot and she’s secretly happy you messed it up? Takes the pressure off of her and lets her have her own wedding? I think your bank account agrees, NTA.”
