Kate Hackett
I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: weddings turn people crazy and horrible and nothing makes people worse than the almighty wedding dress.
That there are actual shows about women “discovering” their dresses and “saying yes” like slack-jawed dummies makes me see red. WHO CARES. You wear something one time and it holds some kind of allure for you? I do not get it.
What I do get, however, is sentimental pieces. That makes sense to me. When other people work hard on something for you, that’s a gift, and that matters. That’s something you should hold in a special place and treasure.
So u/DressTheBest‘s post on AITA on Reddit as she wondered if she was an assh*le “for not letting my cousin borrow my wedding dress” caught my eye. I’ll let her explain:
5 years ago I got got married and I had a custom wedding dress made by my MIL. My MIL has since passed in a car accident. It was so unexpected and it broke my husband’s heart. We are saving the wedding dress for my daughter who was named after my MIL.
OP explains that she had her dress made by her mother in law, who has since passed away. The OP also had a daughter, who was named after the MIL.
My cousin Gigi (no direct blood relationship my MIL) is now wanting to wear my wedding dress. Her, her mother and my grannie are all on this war path that this is her dream dress and I should let her wear it. It would be a tribute to my MIL (again this is my side of my family and no direct relationship to my MIL).
But OP’s cousin Gigi loves this dress. Of course she does. And now OP is being assailed on multiple fronts as other members of her family demand Gigi get to wear this dress. None of these people have any relation to the Mother in Law.
Gigi was obsessed with my wedding dress when I had it and she’s has already said she wanted to wear it. Gigi is not my size (much larger boobs and hips) so the dress would have to be majorly altered. My husband said “no” he wants to have our daughter wear it when she’s grown up and have it altered for her or turned into a vail. My daughter is under a year and my family said that’s years off and I should let them borrow it now.
Gigi is a different size, so the dress would need to be altered, but OP and her husband want to save it for their infant daughter to wear when she’s ready for it.
My cousin has turned petty at my refusal and as disinvited my parents, siblings and their children. She told her that I’m costing her thousands of dollars because she’s had to pay for dress to look like mine. She’s also mad because I won’t lend her my dress to have it copied because I 100% don’t trust her with it. My auntie and grannie have banned me from their life over this because it’s the one thing my cousin has wanted since she saw me in my wedding dress. I was told if I don’t do this I’m cut off from any events my grannie host and my mom is too because she has raised such a selfish and entitled daughter.
And so OP’s family is furious. They’re threatening to cut her out of events and are mad that OP is not lending this gown. Kind of a lot for a damn dress, right?
So what was Reddit’s verdict?
Yup, that’s a big old NOT THE ASSHOLE here. Agreed!
