Patricia Grisafi
Have you ever thought you hung up the phone and said something totally bizarre only to find out that you had not in fact done that? And the person on the other end heard everything you said? Or vice versa — maybe you were having a conversation with a customer service representative who thought you were done and then released a barrage of insults? On Reddit, folks are sharing the craziest things they heard after hanging up the phone. Let it be a reminder to always check!
1. Baby Talk
“I left a client a voicemail and thought I hung up but in fact I proceeded to talk baby talk to my roommates cat for several minutes while it was recording.” —
2. “Are You Wearing Pants?”
“Not a crazy story but I had just finished talking to a client over the phone, we say our goodbyes, then I hear her ask ‘are you wearing pants today?’ I wasn’t sure how to answer that but I figure she was jokingly asking because everyone just started working from home due to covid. I just replied ‘Yes.’ She then burst out laughing trying to explaining that she thought she had already hung up and she was actually asking her husband that question. We laughed about it for about 3 mins before we actually hung up.” —
3. Customer Was Right
“I worked in sales (inbound call) and had a pleasant conversation with a customer who politely declined the offer and told me she was going to look elsewhere. We said our goodbyes, nothing out of the ordinary. Really sweet lady, had called in with her husband. As soon as she thought she hung up, she slammed her phone down and starts yelling at her husband ‘f*ck (company name) are you f*cking sh*tting me right now? $350 a f*cking year? I’m not paying that much for this goddamn piece of sh*t (product) how the f*ck could that b*tch pitch that with a straight f*cking face?’ I gave her the decency of hanging up myself after that but she was 100% in the right being pissed haha.” —
4. “That Worked”
“I had a job where I was in a position to write-off a substantial phone bill, which the customer said was because her mother was dying overseas and she had dementia and needed to hear things in her voice to believe anything, including doctor’s instructions. She was heartbroken and sobbing about how if she had the kind of money to pay this phone bill, she would have just gone back to her country because the flight would have cost less (she was right about that). I wrote-off the entirety of the phone bill, she cried like a jilted lover in a rom-com and said people like me are angels from god etc. After I wished her a good evening and she thought the call was ended, she says to someone in a perfectly normal voice ‘Well, that worked!'”
5. They Forgot
“I called a service provider who was supposed to order certificates of good standing from a state and they were late in sending them over. They told me there was a delay at the state’s office and gave me a new estimate. They forgot to hang up, and I heard them telling their coworker that they’d completely forgot to send in the time sensitive request in the first place. Never used them again.” —
6. Trust Issues
“After a business convo: ‘I don’t trust those guys.'” —
7. Conference Call
“Business conference call, the other side had asked some pretty stupid questions but was still poised to do >$1M worth of business with us. Thinking the call had ended, one guy in the room started calling them f*cking idiots and talking about how what they were trying to do was never going to work, etc. They didn’t say anything else, but we all heard the sound of the other side disconnecting and they later reached out and said they were going to go in another direction.” —
8. Mute Yourself
“I have a ‘not muted’ story. Webex, 500 people on the call, right when everyone was getting used to working remotely. Whoever set it up didn’t mute the audience by default. The chaos was amazing. Dozens of people simultaneously unmuted and going about their lives. Dogs barking, kids crying, kitchen utensils clanging, the call leaders PLEADING for people to mute themselves. My favorite part was when they had things mostly quiet, about 5 people were still unmuted, including one guy who thought he was muted who yelled “JESUS F*CKING CHRIST PEOPLE, MUTE YOUR F*CKING PHONES” before realizing he was not on mute. They threw in the towel and ended the 1.5 hour meeting after 15 minutes.” —
9. Grandma
“Grandma left me a voicemail asking for my help with stuff on her computer. She thought she hung up but she didn’t and I hear her call me a ‘f*cking bitch.’ Haven’t really talked to her since.” —
10. Two Phones
“Not really crazy, but my grandparents would always call me from 2 different phones in their house so we could all talk. When they’d get my voicemail and leave a message, instead of hanging up they’d talk to each other. Usually silly things like ‘what’s for dinner’ and stuff like that, but it always made me smile. I wish there had been a way to keep them back then.” —
11. Meatloaf
“About twenty years ago, my mother was coordinating a fundraiser for my brother’s crew team. One of the fathers called and left a message, but didn’t hang up. He thought he did, but he didn’t. He then proceeded to sing the entire first verse and chorus of meatloaf’s ‘Paradise by the Dashboard Light’ into our answering machine. I sat there, listening in disbelief as it happened. I still have the recording and it is incredible.” —
12. Who Is Dave?
“A doctor’s office: ‘f*ck you, Dave!’ I don’t know who Dave is. I’m not Dave.” —
13. Toilet Issues
“I have a discount digestive system, and I take a lot of work calls while on the toilet. Usually I’m pretty good at muting the mic on my phone at the right time. However one time I lost all control while talking to someone. Luckily they found it hilarious. I was troubleshooting a problem with them, and he goes ‘looks like we’re both having issues.’ That’s one of the many memories that keep me up at night.” —
14. Expletives
“I was the third party in this. A coworker failed to hang up properly after a conversation with the boss and promptly went on a very creative expletive laden rant about the boss and what he should do with himself. As this went on I received a text from the boss suggesting I should inform the coworker that she’d not hung up. I got coworker’s attention and told them they hadn’t hung up. Still in expletive mode I was asked what made me think that. My response was ‘I got a text from boss.’ First time I ever saw color literally drain from someone’s face.” —
15. Lost Our Reputation
“A former colleague of mine said something in the line of ‘god I hate that motherf*cker’ after he hung up on our largest client, problem is he didn’t hang up. Not the worst I heard, but we lost our biggest client, our reputation and in the end all our business. Some 25 people lost their jobs. Pro tip: don’t tie up 80% of your sales to one customer, also don’t tell that customer that you hate that motherf*cker.” —
16. Bong Rip
“My brother-in-law got a friendly reminder that the company can still hear him even when he puts the customer on hold. This was because he was taking a big bong rip while waiting on the customer.” —
Featured Image: Pexels
