Stephanie Barnes
Most people are guilty of putting on rose-colored glasses and ignoring reality and its harsh truths. We do this to protect our happiness for as long as possible, but sometimes we’re doing more harm than good. The fact is: Ignoring dark realities doesn’t make them go away. We have to acknowledge the things that make us uncomfortable in order to fix them. Unfortunately, not everyone wants to hear this.
In a recent Reddit thread, people are chiming in to discuss common dark realities that others live in denial about.
The responses are pretty eye-opening. Answers include refusing to admit you might be the problem and the possibility that Gen X might not be able to retire comfortably.
If you’re ready to take off your rose-tinted shades, here are 20 common dark realities we need to accept.
Trigger Warning: Mention of suicide.
1. It’s you…
Sometimes you’re the problem.
2. Mind over matter?
That you can also alter your memories to believe your own lie if you think about it enough.
3. Duration doesn’t affect quality
Just because something lasts a long time – like a marriage, or a job – doesn’t mean it’s any good at all. There are lots of reasons that things don’t end, some are very bad.
4. It’s a passive but present desire
Just because people aren’t suicidal don’t mean they don’t want to be dead.
5. We’re worried about Gen X
Gen X is in serious trouble when it comes to paying for retirement.
6. Loss is inevitable
You will lose everyone you’ve ever known and cared about – either to the end of the relationship, your death, or theirs. We only borrow the people we love for a short time.
7. Cue that John Legend track
That a majority of us are completely utterly ordinary people, and that’s okay.
8. “I like being anonymous and unimportant…”
I am an accountant. I have a husband and 2 cats. I’m not having kids. I have a little apartment, and maybe one day a house with a garden.
I will never achieve anything significant. I don’t even want to have my own business. I will never be famous. I will never be rich. I will be forgotten by everyone within a couple of decades of my death. Nothing will be different because I was here.
I am completely and utterly okay with that. I like being anonymous and unimportant. It’s very freeing. I am very grateful for my life. I am very, very happy.
9. Love isn’t enough
Loving someone enough will not ensure your relationship will be successful. Loving your child enough will not ensure they love you back or that they live a good life.
10. “Horrible things happen everyday…”
…and the ones we hear about are largely a reflection of self-interest.
11. Life
Life is often random and unfair.
12. Disability doesn’t discriminate
Anyone can become disabled at any age at anytime.
When I was working with disabled adults the company I worked for always emphasized this- we were only one life changing event away from being in the shoes of our clients.
13. “And you’d never know”
There could be kidnapping victim suffering from extreme abuse right down the road from you and you’d never know.
I work in daycare. There’s a lady I used to work with who discovered something like this. She said she went to babysit for a neighbor who she didn’t know had a baby. Was told not to go into the baby’s room. Did anyway. And discovered an abused child.
Who had apparently been with this lady for years.
14. Sometimes, it doesn’t get better
It might get better. But it’s gonna suck until it does.
15. “Most people don’t get what they deserve—except in movies.”
Good things can happen to bad people. They can live the best of lives and sleep soundly at night. They could live their entire lives and die without ever being held responsible for anything they’ve done. Millions of horrible people have lived and died and no one will ever know of the horrors they’ve been apart of. Meanwhile, horrible things can happen to good people. In the grand scheme of things there is no universal morality or justice.
16. Toxic family members
Just because they have your blood doesn’t mean they are good for you or that you have to stay there.
17. Slavery
Slavery still exists in many places of the world.
18. Foster care
When foster kids turn 18 they are tossed to the streets.
19. Prison system
The number of innocent people in prison.
20. How we justify addiction…
Alcohol has me by the balls, makes my life worse, puts undue stress on my family, and will probably be the death of me. But in my mind, I find a way to justify it every day.
