Ruin My Week
Every woman in the world has been in a situation where they either haven’t been taken seriously or have been completely ignored until their male counterpart chimed in which, somehow, made the issue suddenly heard. Like, still?! COME ON!
There is nothing more frustrating than being the person in charge, the client or the one paying for a service just to be treated as though some sort of permission must be given by whatever dude is REALLY in charge. The anger and frustration is real for these badass queens so let’s join in on the fury by hearing the stories.
Reddit user u/teacherspet5859438e asked the women of Reddit
“What is your ‘I am the client, not my husband. Stop ignoring me’ story?”
Warning: these stories will absolutely piss you off. Enjoy!
1. Always go with the female salesperson in these situations
“I was shopping for a car several years ago the salesmen at every dealership kept talking to my husband instead of me even though I was the one who contacted the dealerships and made sure to introduce myself first.
My husband got sick of it and started telling them “Don’t talk to me, it’s not my car. Talk to her.” I wound up buying from a saleswoman who treated us equally until she pretty quickly figured out my husband was not involved whatsoever in the decision.” –Dakizo
2. This dude better have lost the election
“25 years ago my husband and I are looking for our first house. He had just graduated and still had student debt. I had been practicing law and had 20k saved for the downpayment. Real estate agent only spoke to husband, even if I asked the questions. In one house we went to look at the basement and the guy says “you don’t want to go there. It has spiders.” I told my husband I wouldn’t ever buy a house from him. Later the guy ran for office and I told everyone the story including a woman that called me randomly to promote his candidacy. Turns out she was his mother. It’s a small thing but indicative of his attitude toward ” the fairer sex”.” –defenselaywer
3. I would have flashed my badge and my gun
“I (38F) caught some hunters trespassing on my property. I wasn’t rude to them at all, just waved from the other side of the field. The next day they show up at my house and one gestures towards the police car in the driveway and asks to speak to my husband about hunting in our woods. I was like “you can talk to him if you want, but that’s my cruiser and this is my land not his.” They still insisted on getting permission from my husband.” –Moleypeg
4. Bless this bike salesman
“For years, I worked at bicycle shops and regularly sold some pretty expensive bikes.
One day, a couple came in. The wife was interested in a bike, and it quickly became apparent that the husband was an overpowering, dominating type. “She wants to do this, she doesn’t want to do that, she likes this, she doesn’t like that” etc.
When it became clear she wasn’t being allowed to do much speaking at all, I would let the husband as the question, and I’d reply by physically turning and giving the answer to the wife, making eye contact with her only and pointedly ignoring the husband. It was pretty blatant.” –Cessnateur
5. There’s just nothin’ like sexism on vacation
“My wife and I in Dubai, being the middle East they would exclusively approach me but the credit card was hers. Every dam time.” –Rumple-skank-skin
6. Obviously the man is to consulted when it comes to breast feeding issues
“When I was a baby for some reason I wouldn’t “latch on” when my mother breast fed me, so I wasn’t eating well. The doctor completely ignored my mom and only talked to my dad because she was “too hysterical”. He was on the verge of finding out what that looked like..” –TheHitListz
7. It’s always nice when the story ends with a win
“At work, I manage a few facility systems in our building (think air handlers, water purification, etc.) I was meeting a new vendor (let’s call him “Pat”) that was servicing one of the systems I was overseeing. Pat had already met the facilities engineer (also a man), so this coworker was introducing me to him. Instead of talking directly to me, Pat turned to my coworker after shaking my hand and asked him, “and what does she do here?” A few weeks later, he had the unpleasant opportunity to learn that I’m the one who calls him when his company falls through and doesn’t deliver. Needless to say, I was not overly polite about it when Pat failed to do his job.” –mchla
8. This salesman is trash but her husband is a treasure
“My husband and I were buying a new mattress. It was a joint decision on the feel of it, but my decision for the price-point/warranty/etc because I was paying for it. In other words, all the stuff we actually needed the salesperson for. Salesperson was a fine guy, old-fashioned, not overtly rude, but he was definitely talking to my husband more than to me (the one with the money to pay). I noticed but, eh, I’m used to it, I was going to get my info and pay the man. Whatever.
My husband, bless him, wandered away all floaty, like he’d never seen a furniture store before (weird, but ok). Then he came back and said, “Hey, can I have some money? I’m going to go check out the (insert dumb little decorative thing in the other part of the store).” I was weirded out because I have never seen him care about a lamp enough to go examine it on his own and also we don’t… we don’t do that? But yeah, I said, sure, and handed him some cash.
The salesman IMMEDIATELY stopped paying attention to my husband. Suddenly, in his mind, I was wearing all the pants. He started asking me what I did for a living, etc and I was able to negotiate for a slightly lower price.
I love my husband so much. He knew exactly what he was doing.” –HansGruberHangover
9. He deserves to lose those fingers in an unfortunate accident
“I’m a female business owner with a male business partner. I’ve had a few customers born in the dark ages and reps that ask to “speak to my boss” but the worst was a guy who snapped his fingers and told me to “put the kettle on girly”. Needless to say he didn’t get his cuppa and he certainly didn’t get the discount he asked for.” –Blondeinsideandout
10. Good co-worker and ally
“I took my colleague out to lunch. He wasn’t a subordinate he was at the same level, however I was given a company card and he wasn’t, due to the nature of our jobs. When the bill came around, the waitress gave it to him because she assumed he would be paying. He graciously grabbed the bill and gave it to me and said “she’s the boss”. Smart move: made me feel validated, and he got a free lunch.” –leafypaq
11. Another example why a college is overrated
“Happened to my mom when we went to look at colleges. The admissions guy opened by shaking my dads hand, constantly directed questions at my dad, and would look to him for confirmation whenever my mom said something. My mom is defacto the money person of our family unit. She manages the family finances and investments and stuff, and was way way way more qualified to comment on things like student loans or expected contribution. When we left that meeting she was absolutely furious that she had to basically fight the admissions person to have a normal conversation.” –Rhodehouse93
12. A little sprinkle of racism in the misogyny
“This August I bought a new truck and took my boyfriend with. He is white and I am Mexican, we arrived at the dealership and I asked about the explorer they had front and center. Salesman comes over and is asking a bunch of questions to my bf. He told him its for me. I was ignored for the entire conversation. I got up and started looking at the truck. A Hispanic Salesman comes and asks me if I need help. I was out of there within 1.5 hours keys in hand. Found my bf with the other salesman. I looked at bf and said I bought the one I wanted Manny G got me squared away. The look of utter disappointment and anger on the guys face was worth it. My bf chuckled and told said “I told you she was the one buying.” Manny you were great.” –messicanamerican
13. God damnit Bruce. She told you she’d do the damn thing.
“My husband and I had our backyard completely dug up and re-landscaped when we bought our house. The landscaper was an older guy, probably around my dad’s age, and my husband and I are pretty young to be homeowners, so I could kinda understand this dude’s condescending attitude. When he came over the first time to do the estimate he almost exclusively addressed my husband even though I’d made it clear I was the one who was doing the designing and knew what I wanted done. When the work was done and I paid him, he kept looking behind me for my husband and almost didn’t give me the aftercare instructions for the new sod, saying he wanted to make sure it was done right so he’d email them to my husband. I finally snapped, “Give me the damn piece of paper, Bruce! I’m the one who will be home during the day to do the damn thing!” (I worked nights at the time). He reluctantly handed it over and called my husband the next day to make sure the lawn got watered. My husband told him, “You’d have to ask her, Bruce. She told you she’d do the damn thing” and hung up.” –JazzberryJimJam
14. She better have ordered another dish out of pure spite
“Girlfriend and I were in a restaurant in Slovakia. The waiter, older local man, comes over and directly addresses absolutely everything he has to say at me. Explains 15+ entrees in exquisite detail, etc. Then turns to my girlfriend and says the only words he says to her all night: “and the ladies, they like this” *beckoning at one dish*. Based on my GF’s face I could tell a. it was bothering her immensely (rightly so) and b. worse, that’s exactly what she wanted on the menu before he came over.” –kunderthunt
15. “High-pressure sales tactics” is one way to put it
“We were looking into replacing our roof, and found a metal roof company who was running a promotion, so I gave them a call and scheduled for someone to come out and give us a quote. I was able to answer all of his questions, but he refused to give me a quote without my husband present (with some “sign before we leave for best price” excuse), and was intent on driving back over the following day (when my husband would be home). I called their main office shortly after he left and said I wasn’t interested in any high-pressure sales tactics, I just wanted a quote, and if they wouldn’t give that to me, the one who would be paying for it, then to not bother coming back out. Didn’t see them again. The three other roofing companies I contacted had no problem dealing solely with me.” –chases_squirrels
16. Yes! Go get your new sportscar elsewhere queen
“I was buying a new sports car. My husband and I walk into the dealership and the sales guy walks up holding his hand out to shake my husband’s hand and asks how he can help. Fine. No biggie. My husband says “she’s buying, not me”. Sales guy glances at me and says to my husband “Well, it’s not just her decision, right?”. We left and I bought my new sports car elsewhere. F-cking asshole.” –epi_introvert
17. Even a PJ wearing man gets more respect than a PhD holding woman. SMDH
“My wife and I are both physicians. She is very type-A and particular. I am much more relaxed and I go with the flow. We recently had a new home built and since then have done a lot in regards to landscaping and adding to the home (finishing the basement, adding on a stand by generator). The thing is, despite my wife usually being the one to reach out to contractors, and despite the fact that she is the one who wants things done in a specific way, and despite the fact that I usually refer them to her, they always try to contact me first, talk primarily to me when we are both present, and reach out to me when they have questions or need to let us know things. It is bizarre. Like, “I am the dude in pajama pants and a sweatshirt playing the floor is lava with the kids. Does it look like I care what kind of finish is on the cabinets. Talk to the wife. We all know she is in charge.” –EntMD
18. Hope this guy felt like the complete ass-hat he is
“Was invited to a weekend away with a supplier to launch their new range. My husband went with and on the ‘order day’ the Financial Manager of the supplier came up to my husband and asked him what he thinks about the new range and what he is considering to buy. My husband replied very dryly that he is only the plus 1 and that he must speak to me seeing that I am the one with the checkbook.” –celesteb4
