Stephanie Barnes
Men often think they’ve got all the right words to sweep women off their feet, but they’re usually wrong. Sure, those words may have been spoken with good intentions but sometimes they just come out sounding creepy and gross. Other times, the intentions aren’t so pure, which makes the situation even worse.
In a recent Reddit thread, women are answering the question:
“What was the most horrific ‘compliment’ a man has ever given you?”
The answers are super cringe-worthy. Most men seem to be convinced that telling a woman she looks good for her age is kind but it’s really not. There’s also the classic comment about being so attracted to her, he can’t control himself, as if that isn’t as rapey as it comes.
Here are 20 horrific comments women have received from men.
1. If I had the chance…
“If I had the chance I don’t think I could stop myself from f–king you.”
Did you just say you’d rape me?? Thankfully the people I was with made it very clear he was no longer welcome.
2. When you were young…
Not to me but, “I bet you were really attractive when you were young.”
3. …for your age
“You look really good…/pause/…for your age.”
Ouch. I’m 50 but not dead,
go f–k yourself, I mean thank you, I guess?
4. Comments about eating
My partner and I were at a higher-end brunch buffet. I behaved as I usually do and our server goes, “Does she usually eat this well, sir?”. I was horrified and thought he was referring to a pet animal.
5. If only…
Always hilarious when men say to me, “I’d totally f–k you if you lost some weight,” as if there’s any chance in hell I’d f–k them at any weight.
6. We could make it work?
“You’re heavier than I like but I can make it work” …??????????
7. Those childbearing hips
“Your hips look like they’ll give birth to strong boys.” There were no coherent words that I could come up with to that “compliment”.
8. “Complimenting” little girls
Some stranger called me “hot” when I was 13 and told me I could pass off as 18 when I told him how old (or young) I was.
It made me sick to the stomach and he sat down next to me when we got on the train and kept talking to me, and I didn’t know how to tell someone else on the train that I felt unsafe since I was a very shy kid.
9. Just gross
I used to get cat called walking to school. We had uniforms and everyone in the area knew we belonged to the middle/high school. That did not stop the guys from telling me how they wanted to discipline me or play out their schoolgirl fantasies or all the other nasty things they said. It made me want to vomit.
10. Why would anyone think this was appropriate?
My former landlord text me that he loved to fantasize about all the places he could hide in my house so that he could ambush me any time he wanted. He reminded me that he had the key. I moved out the next week.
11. Just gets worse
Similarly, my first week living with a landlord I was apologizing a lot and washing my dishes one day and he said “if you apologize one more time I’ll have to bend you over my knee and spank you” he’s 50, his wife lives there too; I’m 23.
12. Mommy issues
I had a guy in college tell me (in the middle of making out) that I reminded him of his mother. Broke up with him the next day. No thank you, Norman Bates.
13. Um, what?
“You look hot, but like addicted to heroin hot”
I told him to f–k off and lick my boots, and he actually licked them. Super weird.
14. This definitely isn’t the way to do it.
“You will look so pretty wearing a hijab”. I am an agnostic and like to wear tank tops.
15. Creep alert
Well I was 14 at an anime convention when a 19-year-old man told me I was hot, followed by “no one here over 16 is hot.”
I was flattered at the time because I had no self esteem and thought I was super unattractive. Whenever I think about it now my skin crawls.
16. What boundaries?
Dude here, but, a real double whammy I just felt compelled to share…. I recently basically banished somebody for life when he made a comment to me that my 12 year old daughter looked “very well developed” and implied that she was “going to make all my hair turn gray” in the next few years.
17. Again, WHAT??
A guy I went out with told me he was “shocked my brother is gay while having such a beautiful sister like me”… I’d hope my f–king brother wouldn’t be attracted to me under ANY circumstance, wtf…
18. Is it really hard to just be respectful?
One time I was walking into my job, which is in a pretty not great neighborhood, and a guy yelled “hey there beautiful” at me. I gave him a look and kept walking. He followed me a few steps, and told me I should have thanked him for “the compliment”. Ladies, I lost it. I lectured that guy so hard. Told him I didn’t have to thank anyone for a “compliment” I didn’t ask for, that women didn’t particularly like unsolicited observations about their looks, and that he should probably either learn to be respectful to women or kindly f–k off.
19. There’s always a but…
“You’re probably very insecure and feel bad about your height but…”.
I’m 5’11”, I get they possibly meant well on some level but I’ve never listen to their whole sentence. (there’s been more than 1 lol).
20. GTFO!
Wasn’t said to me but to one of my friends, I was at the bar with, about me.
“Your friend looks like she would be hard to rape.”
