Ruin My Week
When people have a question in this brave new world they don’t turn to their friends, parents, or (lol) clergy, they go directly to the source of all information. I’m talking, of course, about Reddit and the immortal sub and hub known as r/AskReddit.
So when a recently posted question on Ask Reddit asked “Reddit, whats the funniest thing that a random stranger said to you that made you die laughing inside?” there was no shortage of replies from people who had a memorable brush with a stranger that has stuck with them to this day.
These random encounters range from the simply odd to the truly wild and they do not disappoint.
1.
“I was in the drive thru of a Wendy’s one time. An employee exited the building with his headphones on and was singing Who Let The Dogs Out at the top of his lungs. He saw me, stopped singing, and started walking away. A few seconds later he come up to my window and said, “yes, that is what I’m listening to.” Then he walked away. I laughed so hard at the whole situation.” – JonoTheDog
2.
“When I was around 10 my dad took my brother and me to a Sox game at Fenway. We get to the park and I was putting mustard on a hotdog from one of those mustard box push down nozzle things, this random guy next to me goes “YEAH BUDDY, LATHER THAT BITCH UP”. 10 year old me thought it was about the funniest thing I’d ever heard, and I still chuckle when I think about it as an adult.” – Dumpo2012
3.
“May of 2000, passing through Norwood Louisiana with a friend, at around 2 in the afternoon we stopped to gas up/grab some snacks at the most podunk gas station known to man.
A young man, extremely agitated comes in with frustrated gestures and angrily shouts/gestures at the cashier with an accent that is beyond region, beyond stereotyping, beyond anything I have heard before:
“Where da’ got damned wally-mellyons at!!” at the top of lungs, approaching hysteria and tears.”
4.
“I was at a 50th wedding anniversary party and there were LOTS of elderly people in attendance. An old man was standing next me and said “it looks like a fucking grave yard in here”. I literally spit my beer out (we were out doors). The kicker was the guy was close to the same age as everyone else.”
5.
“When i was about 8 yrs old (40 some odd yrs ago) my mother and i were waiting to be seated at a restaurant, and an older gentleman was ahead of us also waiting. The waitress asked him if he’d be smoking (back when that was still a thing in restaurants), and he replied “no, but i may burst into flames later”. Young me laughed all through lunch at that, in fact it still makes me giggle lol.”
6.
“In college, this one girl in the front of the room chimes in on something, and mentioned that her eyes change color during the summer every year from blue to green.
This black dude in the back of the class whispers to his friend “yeah bitch, and I turn white in winter”.
I had to remove myself immediately before I made a scene from laughing so hard.”
– BriFM
7.
“At a festival and sitting around the campfire when a very intoxicated man kept saying “I need to borrow your fireplace!” He wouldn’t let it go, despite being right by the fire. Turns out he needed a lighter for his cigarette and was so drunk that he forgot what it was called. My laughter was not internal. I died laughing right in front of him.” – LisaPaBisa
8.
“When I was a freshmen in college I had a pair of rainbow bellbottoms I made and wore a lot. I walking through the city back to the dorms when a guy rode up behind me on a bicycle. He was old, had long, scraggly gray hair and a bright red and yellow windsuit on. He rode beside me for a second, stared and then yelled “Miss your pants are hot….HWAAAAT” and the rode away into the sunset. It was so random and hilarious. Every time I wore those pants my friends would run up behind me and yell “Your pants are HWAT”” – StarrySky
9.
“My friend and I (both female) used to go to the Saturday market to buy fruit and veg. My friend is quite shy towards other people. I had just bought two huge watermelons and was carrying them, one arm each. As a guy walked past us, he shouted: “YOU’VE GOT NICE BIG MELONNSSSS!” Didn’t say anything else, just kept walking. My friend was shocked and I almost peed myself laughing so much.” – NerakSob
10.
“Watched a guy walking to class at my college years ago saying “Get the fuck out of my way” to a pigeon standing in his path. The pigeon quickly waddled off to the side.”
