Kate Hackett
I cannot believe how many people shared these truly heartbreaking stories. The folks in the BuzzFeed Community shared stories of how they realized they fell out of love with their partners. The stories are all really crushing. Some of them are big, clear moments that are too difficult to rescind or adjust to, but others, and I personally find these to be the real heartbreakers, are just these little blips. Things that at the start of the relationship may have gone unnoticed, but after a while…
Ugh, anyway. Please grab some tissues for this list.
1. Sister’s burial
“After my sister’s burial service, he left me to go home and play video games. I was all by myself talking to all these people when I needed him the most, because it was the worst day of my life.” —hannahrosep46c525402
2. Couldn’t stand her
“I noticed I was falling out of love when everything she did started to annoy me. It felt like I couldn’t stand her. I missed the honeymoon phase. I moved away that year and we didn’t talk for months. Eventually we just didn’t care anymore and broke up.” —fruityduchess
3. Walk out the door
“When my ex-husband kept threatening to walk out the door and not one piece of me wanted him to stay.” —waterbad82
4. Falling asleep alone
“I would fall asleep next to him and just feel incredibly alone. Sharing a bed should be intimate and comforting, but it just made me feel depressed and isolated.” —elizabetho4582daf96
5. Didn’t care about me
“She kept telling me about her problems and I had to listen all the time and be compassionate. When I tried to tell her how I felt about being bullied at school, she told me I was overreacting, and that bullying was “no big deal.” I should have broken up with her sooner.” —silencesilence
6. Wishing for an affair (yikes)
“When I found myself wishing he’d have an affair so I could finish things without being the bad guy.” —lola465
7. Treated her like crap after her sister died
“When my sister had a tragic car accident and died, I went crying to him, and he tried to seduce me. And then, I was planning my sister’s funeral with my family and simultaneously watching him cheat on me in real time. He left his Facebook logged into my phone and was inviting his ex over because I was too busy planning the funeral. Piece of sh*t.” —mp30819
8. Left when she got sick
“Married for 32 years. Both of us were very active, and over the years, we often commented on how we could never see ourselves without the other person. At around year 20, I was diagnosed with a degenerative disease. I shared all the info and prognosis with him; he was supportive in many ways.
Over time, I started to slow down, but the first time he saw me in a wheelchair, he just stared at me and then walked away. It was like a knife in my heart because I knew at that moment that I didn’t want to be with someone who would look at me with pity/disgust or would never again see me first and not my disability.” —talliloo
9. No patience for a kitten
“We volunteered to foster kittens. Seeing how little patience he had with those innocent little fluff-heads made me see him from a different perspective.” “I remember the exact moment: He got angry at a kitten for not wanting to play with him and how it was hiding under the couch. I kept saying to him, ‘She’s scared, just leave her alone. She’s allowed to hide until she feels safe.’ And it was like, damn…that’s me.
The very next day, I started planning my escape. I never left him alone with the kittens we fostered, and I gave the animal shelter a heads up so he wouldn’t be on their foster list anymore. Got rid of my man but ended up adopting a kitten.” —hotpink
10. The minimum
“When I realized all my husband is interested in is giving the bare minimum. I don’t even mind if it’s just for me, but we have two beautiful but very challenging special needs kids. They deserve better.” –missusmelonpan
11. Complimented
“I realized I was done after I was complimented by a coworker on my appearance and performance (I’m an actor). The compliment took me completely by surprise because it had been so long since I heard anything positive like that from my husband. How happy a simple compliment made me led me to realize what I was missing out on.” —courtneyw4d1efa99d
12. Just a bad person
“After my friend died of suicide, my ex told me he did it for attention. Then I realized how shitty of a person he was.” —reaganskinner18
13. No empathy
“When one of my dogs died out of the blue, it sent me into a huge depression that I’m still recovering from almost 2 years later. The first time I left the house I threw up and had to come right back home. Then I went to see my boyfriend and he kept kissing me seductively. Honestly, it disgusted me. It took so much for me to even talk to him. At that moment I thought, either this guy is completely unaware of my feelings and who I am or he’s just a selfish dick who has no empathy.” —doggolove
14. He’s an alcoholic
“It was when he accused me of having alcohol problems in public. I felt sad because he was projecting onto me. He is an an alcoholic who has been through rehab for his problems. I realized the man I had once loved was buried in his own mire of self pitying filth, so I let him go.” —willowg
15. Ashley Madison
“When I found his Ashley Madison account.” —k4e39fd4aa
16. Gambler
“It was a year into our relationship when he told me he gambled away his one month paycheck. I didn’t think anything of it at first, but it happened again five more times. I just got exhausted with the excuses and I realized that he was a gambling addict. The worse part, he didn’t want professional help.” —angelap41094cbb3
17. Hard to talk to him
“I feel bad about it because he had high functioning autism, but the amount of time he’d spend on his phone or Nintendo when we were hanging out. It would be difficult to converse with him sometimes because he’d be so wrapped up in video games. The lowest point was when I was feeling down about something, he gave me a hug and I realized he was still playing his Nintendo while he had his arms around me.” —cigarettemouse
18. Left when OP had cancer
“He walked out on me two months after I was diagnosed with a rare type of cancer. When he finally called me, he had driven halfway across the country and wasn’t sure when or if he would be back. He knows that I have no family to support me. Nine years together with almost no fighting, and our marriage was over. Since then, he doesn’t answer my phone calls and barely responds to important texts, unless it is to inquire about our divorce papers. I’m not sure if I’ve fallen out of love with him or if I’m just telling myself that so I don’t break into a million pieces.” —Crystal1983
19. Abusive
“When we were shopping with his mum and sister, and the three of us were playfully mocking him. He just lost it; he screamed at me and then took his sharp thumbnail and ran it down my badly sunburnt arm, making it bleed.” —frans410af24ac
20. Excuses to not see him
“When I started making excuses not to see him. I realized I was happier spending time by myself. Having him over started to feel like an obligation. I did love him, but I was no longer in love with him.” —mmcdo8
