Kate Hackett
Redditor u/BlolololS12 recently took to Reddit’s famed AITA sub to wonder if she was wrong “for texting my husband’s coworker off his phone.” The case here is a little complex, so let’s see what the original poster had to say for herself.
She starts by explaining that the two of them have been together for nine years and are recently married.
Background info:
I (22F) and my husband (24M) have been together for 9 years and married for about 5 months.
He has a flirty coworker and the company is small, so there’s not much to be done to avoid her.
He has a coworker who has constantly overstepped boundaries and tried to flirt with him for almost a year now. She had gotten a little bit better since we got married, but not very much. He also works at a small job with only about 5-6 total employees that helps care for aminals.
Here is what happened this morning:
The morning OP posted, OP noticed that the coworker’s snapchats were sent in a sports bra and boxers.
This coworker has a streak with my husband on snapchat and I’ve been noticing lately that she has been sending her streaks snapchat to him in her sports bra and boxers (what she sleeps in she claims)
OP doesn’t like it, but her husband has drawn decent boundaries and only replies to work issues.
as much as i didnt like it i let it go because my husband doesn’t respond when she sends anything weird and really only responds to work related issues.
OP also explains that she and her husband have an open phone policy.
And before anyone asks, yes we have an open phone policy in our marriage. We both have nothing to hide from each other and he definitely isn’t “hiding” her. He lets me read their text messages and look at their snaps all the time. HOWEVER, this morning I go to send his streaks for him because he always forgets and I like to keep our streak (I’m just weird like that).
But this morning, the coworker sent another picture in her bra and boxers… but this time, the coworker started to expose herself to OP.
And I open hers to see that she has sent him yet another streaks picture in her bra and boxers expect this time she is pulling down the boxers on one side and exposing her thong and half of her ass. I was not cool with this at all.
So OP told her to knock it off, pretending to be her husband. The woman said “it’s a joke” and OP’s husband was furious. A little bit because OP texted AS him, but really because OP interfered with his work.
So I messaged her off his phone and said, “hey I’m married. You have got to stop sending me those types of pictures” to which she replied, “I sent that to all my streaks it’s just a joke.” I told my husband and he BLEW UP on me. I understand I shouldn’t be texting people from his phone but he wasn’t mad about that. He called me an asshole because I now interfered with his work and when he went in this morning she was gonna make his whole day a living hell.
This woman apparently will make his day hell by giving him crappy work to do. OP rightly figured this is sexual harassment.
He told me she does this by giving him the grunt work that no one else wants to do, makes him do it alone, and makes everyone else not talk to him all day while on shift. (She isnt his boss or anything, but she has been there longer and has seniority. All of her friends also work at this place.) I personally think that’s got to be against some sort of HR policy because it smells like sexual harassment to me.
She doesn’t see that she did anything wrong, but she also understands her husband’s point of view.
I just feel like I didn’t do anything wrong by setting a boundary with her that he is afraid to set because he is afraid of her retaliation at work. However, I also understand where he is coming from not wanting me to interfere because he doesn’t want to make it awkward. But those snaps aren’t okay to send fully committed married men.
AITA here?
This is absolutely sexual harassment. Plain & simple. However, in my opinion, this isn’t her place.
Some Redditors believe her husband is cheating. “From reading your history, this guy is cheating. End of story,” one said.
“She is completely out of line. He should be shutting this shit down himself. But impersonating him is unacceptable and makes you an AH too, as is messaging her at all without talking to him first. This is his work life you’re messing with, it’s on him to resolve. You’re completely right to be annoyed but this was too far,” another user wrote in.
