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Women Are Sharing The Relationship Moments When They Realized ‘I Deserve Better’

Relationships have their ups and downs but sometimes when we’re in deep, it’s tough to notice when the bad outweighs the good. Not everyone has an absurdly honest overbearing bestie to drop-kick the reality of how terrible their relationship is. For everyone else, it takes a lot of dealing with BS until you have a real “I deserve better” moment.

The ladies of the internet are sharing their relationship “ah-ha” moments in a viral Reddit thread where u/zoozoospetals asked:

“Have you had an “I deserve better” moment in a relationship? What was it?”

And girls, the tea is spilling ALL over this thread.


1. It was the mug for her

“It was this past Christmas and I’d put hours of thought and effort into his gifts, couldn’t wait to see his face light up (which it did). He gave me what looked like a free coffee mug and it was like a smack in the face how little he cared about me. It wasn’t the money or gift per se, it was what it represented. He was utterly indifferent to my feelings. The last straw of many straws that broke this camels back.” –Ranga_Unchained

2. Ah, HELL nah

“When I expressed concern over his drinking habits he slapped me hard enough that he knocked me off the chair I realized I did deserve better than an alcoholic.” –Dorlane

3. Didn’t even need him anyway

“Coming out of hospital for surgery and finding out instead of coming to help look after me as he promised (I was unable to walk on my own) he was out drinking with friends.” –AprilDink

4. Take out the trash

“When I walked into my ex-boyfriends house to surprise him on Valentine’s Day to find my best friend prancing around half naked, he told me it was all my fault and proceeded to dump a full beer on my head while they both pointed and laughed at me. Yep. I walked out and never looked back. Ill be damned if I spend anymore of my life being humiliated by garbage people like them.” –fairytaleblue

5. Oh, absolutely not

“When I asked him to buy me some tampons. I asked him where he put it and he said “in the cabinet” so I looked through all the cabinets in my apartment and stupid me realized that there’s no tampons. I asked him if I was looking for nothing and he sent me a smiley face with a halo on top. I was done completely. That night I went to bed early, peacefully.” –1deboo

6. Boy, BYE

“Continuous lying to “protect me”. Nah dude. You lied to protect yourself because you knew I’d want to leave if i found out again.” –blackwidowe

7. It wasn’t even broken though!

“When he yelled at me for spilling water on his laptop, after I already profusely apologized and said I would buy him a new one if it were broken (it wasn’t broken).” –lavender-pears

8. This will NOT be tolerated

“I realized I deserved better when he didn’t stand up for me while his family made racist jokes at the dinner table; and didn’t bother to check on me after I left the table in tears.” –Quizas-Quizas-Quizas

9. It’s called girlFRIEND

“When he told me he doesn’t like talking to me, I wasn’t his friend, just his girlfriend.” –poutine-destroyer

10. And that was IT

“Me: you should be happy that I am having fun with my friends

Him: not if I’m not there

And that was it. Those were the words I needed to hear. It all came crashing down at that moment. There were many red flags before this moment, but this is what did it for me.” –eekbarbadurkle1

11. The audacity!

“When I was told that what I’m asking for is a burden. I said, “I’m asking for bare minimum, you make that feel like a burden” and he said “that is a burden” –traveldeeper

12. That is just disrespectful

“I rushed my parents on a day they were spending with me on their vacation so that I could spend an hour with him before he went on a trip (as I had promised). I showed up and he was sloppy drunk and yelled at me “why didn’t you bring me fooooood?” –Bride_of_KoolaidMan

13. I believe the word you’re looking for is TOXIC

“I started getting physically sick from the stress of constant betrayal. Lethargy, insomnia, vomiting, and shaking.” –Mrs_Clean-

14. I smell gaslighting

“When he pushed me to go to therapy because there was so much wrong with me, according to him. The therapist told me he was emotionally abusing me.” –QueenofSavages

15. Where’s the basic human decency?!

“I never once asked my ex to be vegan or change his ways. I’d even go to his favorite steak restaurants and settle with fries and pasta with sauce. I tried to have an open mind but when it came to me he didn’t. There once was a vegan festival that comes by once a year and it would have meant the world if he went with me. Instead, he stood outside the venue and was like “I’m waiting outside text me when you’re done.” As I sat in the grass alone eating a seitan sandwich I waited for 45 minutes alone. Mannnn, screw that.” –shockedpikachu123

16. Doesn’t get much clearer than that

“When I heard the words “I will punch you in your fucking face.” –americanrecluse