Ah, the whole ‘what women want’ question that has plagued straight men since the dawn of time.
In this instance, it’s sex. And bless Redditor whambamshangalan to turn to anonymous internet sources to get the answer.
In the r/askreddit subreddit, the question “What do girls want guys to say during sex?” was posed.
And women came (uh… no pun intended) to the rescue.
The answers ended up being helpful for straight guys looking for direction that they may be too embarrassed to ask their partners. Basically, everyone wins in this thread.
Let’s see some of the advice offered.
1. No quiet jackhammering
“It depends entirely on the relationship. But as a general, we don’t want you to be a silent jackhammering machine. We want noise too—moans or cussing, etc.”
AnonymousDifficulty
2. Be playful
“Once, I let my boyfriend just play with my boobs for as long as he liked. I was surprised how long he wanted to just lie there and play with them – maybe 45 minutes? It was so sweet and funny when he said, totally serious, “this is like a dream come true.” I’ll always remember that.
But hey, Nothing wrong with “you’re so hot” or “you feel so good.”
3. Feel free to worship
“I once had a dude tell me I was a goddess while I was on top of him. Instant confidence boost, felt 10,000% sexier.”
4. Growl a little
“Growls are the best. It’s like not only is your partner enjoying themselves, they’re so into it they’ve resorted to their primal state oooof”
5. Be funny
“Softly whisper the lyrics to cotton eyed joe”
6. Communicate
“Words aren’t necessary but if you’re feeling pleased do vocalize it. Silence or just looking at me is odd. I want feedback.
Say what feels good, if you want me to do something or stop doing something. Moan, groan, swearing (i know it’s not just me who loves it when they’re so turned on the whisper ‘fuck’. Makes me feel very confident). Communication is a turn on. Say our names will make us crazy.
7. Don’t fake it
“Anything not performative. You wanna moan, moan. You wanna say FUCK OMG, say it. But don’t fake it. We can tell”
8. Get loud
“‘I don’t care if the neighbors hear you, I love how loud you get when you come!'”
9. Give feedback
“Nothing particular. I just want to know if my partner is really enjoying that. I absolutely hate it when men are so silent during sex that I can even barely hear their breathing. Moaning is super hot. Doesn’t have to be super loud porn moaning, but some ohs, ahs and mmhms are strongly appreciated. And obviously I want him to tell me if he is uncomfortable/in pain/cold/I am bending his dick to a wrong direction too much/he wants to change position.
Some compliments are also good but it’s super important to make your girl feel SPECIAL so AVOID saying things like “I love how girls bite their lip like that, it’s so sexy”. “I love how YOU bite your lip like that”. And typical stuff like “You’re so hot” are totally okay.”
10. Give a preview
“I like my guys to let me know that they’re enjoying themselves just as much as I am. I like it when they moan, let some expletives slip, or say my name, and I even like it when they tell me what they’re about to do to me next. 😈”
11. Get mushy
“I love you”
12. Be encouraging
“I like being told I’m a good girl during blow jobs. But everybody has different preferences.”
13. Mostly: moan
“Moan. Swear. A lot. Say my name. “You feel so good/You’re so tight.” “Oh God, I’m gonna cum.” Moaning. Tell me I’m hot/beautiful/sexy/gorgeous. Moaning. Tell me how much you love my features. Moaning.”
14. Unleash your inner animal
“My boyfriend will sometimes make this very slight almost animalistic growl that I can’t get enough of. It’s subtle yet sexy”
15. Be positive
“YES.”