Though scientists have been digging in holes for years, they’ve only just now discovered a well-preserved dinosaur butthole—and it’s connecting a lot of dots.
Live Science reports that the butthole is actually called a cloacal vent. It’s not like a mammalian butthole. It can poop, pee, and lay eggs. Sort of like the difference between an unfinished basement and a rec room. And yes, it’s also used for breeding.
What researchers are really surprised about is just how much it was likely related to breeding. The preserved hiney shows two small bulges that they think might have contained scent glands that could be used in courtship. Crocodiles have the same sort of business down there and use it to attract mates as well.
https://twitter.com/LiveScience/status/1351635302582939651
These similarities are not an exact replica. The dino’s booty is unique, according to Jakob Vinther, a paleobiologist at the University of Bristol in the United Kingdom.
“It’s its own cloaca, shaped in its perfect, unique way,” Vinther said. Beautiful. As you can see:
This particular dinosaur is a Psittacosaurus, which Live Science describes as “a bristly tailed, Labrador-size, horn-faced dinosaur,” related to the Triceratops. It likely lived from about 145 million to 65 million years ago, which is a really long time to keep it tight.
Vinther had seen the specimen before but hadn’t noticed the fine detail.
“Then, I got a chance to look at the specimen again, up close, and suddenly realized, ‘Oh my god, the cloaca is actually quite well preserved, and we can actually see some anatomy that I didn’t think we could see,'” Vinther said.
He and study co-researchers Robert Nicholls, the paleoartist who recreated the love scene above, and Diane Kelly, an expert on vertebrate penises and copulatory systems, gathered around to really get in deep.
Some observations Kelly made were that the dinosaur probably had copulatory sex and that the hole was ringed with melanin, meaning it was a distinctive color from the area around it. Sort of like a target.
Even better, the butt had poop in it. What a dream! “It’s like a Swiss Army knife of excretory openings,” Vinther said. “It does everything.”
How did these creatures ever go extinct? Though the entire situation is kind of a joke already, here are some of the funniest tweets about it:
1.
At last, a return to believing in science. https://t.co/5c8Erxj2XX
— anildash.com (@anildash) January 20, 2021
2.
https://twitter.com/hachx0/status/1351664784681402368
3.
my "i've already seen the dinosaur butthole article" cookie cake has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my big cookie pic.twitter.com/DOq95Z3Czv
— lighthouse prince cole (@historiancole) January 20, 2021
4.
First Preserved Dinosaur Butthole Is 'Perfect' and 'Unique' and 'En Route to Florida'
— man it’s a hot zone, (@Mobute) January 20, 2021
5.
CUT TO: spring break montage https://t.co/wprm6YFK8N
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) January 20, 2021
6.
Remember, you are like a Dinosaur’s butthole, you are perfect and unique.
— Montana Rosslyn (Comms Open) (@MontanaRosslyn) January 20, 2021
7.
Yeah. And it’s leaving the Oval Office tomorrow, https://t.co/4oivp2jY9Z
— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) January 19, 2021
8.
i would like to purchase it for my personal collection https://t.co/49a3SzxDN0
— Neeraj K. Agrawal (@NeerajKA) January 20, 2021
9.
i hope someone will talk about me like this 145 million years from now https://t.co/gJAiT3E6PH
— kk (@guinep_paltrow) January 20, 2021
10.
A "unique and perfect" butthole. Sadly, we were all born 65 million years too late to enjoy it. https://t.co/AmLjXsjtH2
— Cleavage Crumbs (@CleavageCrumbs) January 20, 2021