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17 Trashy Birthday Parties You’ll Be Glad You Weren’t Invited To

The Venn diagram of things people do at children’s birthday parties vs the things people do at fun parties are two completely separate circles. Suffering at a kid’s birthday party is part of the parenthood agreement. This is not the time to break out a beer bong, have a sexy cake, or to wear your horniest kitschy t-shirt. Unfortunately, I guess no one gave these people that announcement. 

Over on the Subreddit, r/Trashy, people shared really trashy birthday parties held by people who have definitely got in a fight at a Walmart. Here are some of the most horrific offenders. 

1.”4 year old nephews birthday? Seems like the perfect time and place for a beer bong!”

2. “What a fantastic way to behave at your 7-year-old’s birthday.”

3. “This dual birthday party for a little girl (horse cake) and grandma (ejaculating erection cake).”

4. “This kid’s birthday party at a roller rink, where a guest wore this disgusting shirt.”

5. “This kid’s birthday party, where a different guest wore a different disgusting T-shirt”

6. ‘Wearing a “Real women marry assholes shirt to a child’s birthday party.’

7.”This guy I know buying a ridiculous amount of alcohol for a 16th birthday party…”

8. “This first birthday party with this cake for (I presume) a breastfeeding baby.”

9. “This birthday party with a (literally) crappy cake.”

10. “This kid’s birthday party with children’s entertainers straight out of a horror film.”

11. “This grandma’s 69th birthday party that really went there.”

12. “This birthday party for a 10-year-old boy at Redneck Heaven (a Hooters-esque sports bar and restaurant in Texas).”

13. “This birthday party for a mom, which featured a “cocaine snorting” themed cake.”

14. “My friend used to be a waiter years ago and worked a birthday party that brought in this cake.”

15. “Just looking for someone to make this weed cake for my 16y/o’s birthday, collecting my mum of the year award later…”

16. “Happy 5th Birthday, Athena! Here’s an edible version of your favorite characters making out. They grow up so fast, don’t they, LeighAnn.”

17. And finally, this trashy birthday cake.