Kate Hackett
Do you ever wonder if, deep down, you’re actually a good person? I definitely do! It’s something I know I want to make sure I am, but how do you know?
u/Soshampulin asked AskReddit:
“What’s a subtle sign that someone IS a good person but doesn’t want to show it?”
And I’m checking myself to make sure I hold up. How do you fare?
1. Sincerity
Probably a boring answer, but I have this friend who I can just tell is really sincere when he asks how I’m doing. I appreciate anyone asking because it’s a convenient conversation starter, but with him I can tell he actually cares what the answer is.
2. Discretion
I see it is a sign of empathy (most of times, at least). They anticipate that openness may be undesirable for you and so they remain discreet in order to make you more comfortable. Be it regarding some information you shared with them or when helping you out with something (“no questions asked”).
3. Helping Others
Helping others for the sake of helping them without expecting anything in return.
4. Just care
Had a teacher growing up that was came across as very strict and standoffish, gave off this air of “learn the material or fail.” In reality though, he would answer any questions you had, even if it was being repeated, was incredibly patient, and would stay as late as he needed to in order to make sure the students understood the material. If a majority of the class bombed a test he would address it with the class to understand what went wrong, and would redo the material if needed.
5. Something good
They are given a chance to quietly talk bad about someone, but instead, says something good.
6. Making space
when you’re in a group and that one person keeps trying to say something or add to the conversation but they keep getting talked over. Then that other person will look at them and say, “Sorry person, I didn’t catch what you were trying to say, can you repeat it?” and makes space for the person being ignored unintentionally. That’s a real gem.
7. Be kind to staff
Admonishes people for being rude to wait staff.
8. Quietly
“True merit is like a river. The deeper it is, the less noise it makes.”
9. Class clown
Guy I used to work with was such a class clown, always cracking jokes. Everybody liked him because he was so funny. It was a while before I realized that his jokes were never at anybody’s expense. He was kind. There was never anything mean in anything he ever said, to anybody’s face or behind their back.
Anyway we’re married now.
10. Considering your point
When you are having an argument and they actually listen to your point instead of just getting ready to make theirs.
11. People who make excuses to do good deeds
Picking you up from the airport? “Oh, it was on my way.”
Buying you a beer? “I accidentally ordered two.”
Helping you move? “I need the work out! Now I don’t have to go to the gym later!”
Volunteering at an event? “I had nothing else going on tonight, I’m just here ’cause my buddy asked me to.”
Anyone who does a favor for you and then acts like you’re doing them a favor, or brushes the favor off as nothing, is a person who is doing the good deed for the sake of it and not for the praise or clout they receive. These are the best kinds of people.
12. Take your time
I always thought of it as a common courtesy, even if I’m not in a hurry. Like if I’m waiting for a Starbucks order and I have nowhere to really be, when someone says “it’ll be out in a few minutes” I just say “don’t worry, take your time” because I always felt it was the polite thing to say.
13. Again, quiet
I had a maths teacher who used to bust my chops. He was fun, but also very temperamental. He’d be silly to a point, then tell you off when you out-sillied his silliness.
I was sat opposite a quiet girl who suddenly looked really distressed. She said something to him in a whisper, and he looked down to a puddle on the floor. She’d wet herself. This was when we were 11-12, so it was quite a big deal.
I clocked this at the same time, and he gave me this look like ‘don’t you dare’, He went over to his desk, poured himself a water, then came back and was pretending to peer at her work, before stumbling and dropping it on her. He apologised and made a big scene and told her she could go and get a spare uniform from the office as it was his mistake.
I really respected that, I think it showed a lot about his character and care.
14. Doing the right thing
When someone is actually in trouble/needs help, they will help out, even if it’s really subtle or disguised as something else.
15. Ignore it
People who ignore things like accidentally spitting while talking or accidentally farting to not make you feel embarrassed.
16. Inclusion
You can tell a good kid when they purposely try to include the quiet shy kid at school, and make an effort to be nice and friendly to them.
