Ruin My Week
11.
I met Marlon Brando through an AOL chat room in the early 90s, we became friends, & a few years later, at 3am one nite, in his “Godfather” voice, he called the thief who stole my 1960 pink Rambler to tell him he’d better keep paying me the monthly court-ordered restitution money. https://t.co/O4CmR6wxRS
— Amy Alkon (@amyalkon) January 7, 2020
12.
I once burglarized a home & stole a safe. I cracked the safe & discovered photos of the owner molesting a child. He reported the burglary to police. I turned the photos in. The cops called him in to discuss the burglary. He confessed. We both went to prison. https://t.co/yxpFN30qgv
— Matthew Hahn (@hahnscratch) January 7, 2020
13.
As a child, I once asked Dave Thomas (founder of Wendy’s) to hold a piece of ribbon while he talked to someone else and then proceeded to run in circles around him until he was tied up https://t.co/YHmv8Hx5uG
— Danny Gay-da-Lore-ian (@weredawgz) January 5, 2020
14.
Before my now-fiancé and I’s first ever date, we realized while apart that we were both listening to Somebody to Love by Queen at the same time. The next day, on our first real date, we accidentally walked in on an entire orchestra playing Somebody to Love. https://t.co/pMo8h2Ysh5
— swaggy p (@paige_vermeer) January 8, 2020
15.
I got a cancer so rare that you literally have only a one in a million chance of getting it.
My husband and I won the lottery three months later. https://t.co/voxawP7UEb
— Punky Mantilla (@PunkyMantilla) January 7, 2020
16.
In response to a touching number of requests… pic.twitter.com/0htR5rC7v3
— Clark Neily (@ConLawWarrior) January 8, 2020
17.
On my 3rd day in New York… the two towers fell.
On the 3rd day after visiting New Orleans… Katrina came.
On the 3rd day after leaving Nepal… the hotel was bombed by rebels.— Jessica Chavez (@HProtagonista) January 4, 2020
18.
My girlfriend years ago wrote a quick thank you in a $10 bill for tip and months later that same bill ended up in my hands as change. I still have that bill because of the coincidence.
— Harry Balczak (@lookmahvelous2) January 7, 2020
19.
when I was 3 I went into my parents’ room in the middle of the night & told them my grandpa was in my room, they assumed I had a nightmare & let me sleep with them, we got the call a couple hours later that he was dead https://t.co/JV7HM1ONAJ
— cc (@cc_fla) January 7, 2020
20.
My high school had to evacuate because of a bomb threat written on a bathroom wall. Turns out it was written by our school’s security guard, whose handwriting incriminated him when his write up of the incident was compared to the threat itself. #LivinLikeLarry https://t.co/muqrMZBtKt
— Haley (@haley_lando) January 8, 2020
