50+ Of The Funniest Tweets We Read This Week

Every week, it is our duty to spend obscene amounts of time scouring Twitter for the funniest stuff we can screencap and share with you.

And every week we narrow it down to our 50-ish favorite funny tweets that popped up in our feeds.

Now, they might be from this week or they may have been retweets of some very funny tweets from long ago. Also, we update this list weekly, so be sure to scroll for past winners!

Either way, these were the 50 or so funniest tweets we saw this week.

Funniest Tweets On Twitter

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https://twitter.com/DiscordianKitty/status/1468309072332132356

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https://twitter.com/UbexBtt/status/1446100410314465286

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https://twitter.com/MarylandMudflap/status/1149062096430047232

12.

Congratulations on becoming a contestant on the Price is Right. Please, put on this clothing from 1979 and follow me.

— Chad Read (@squirrel74wkgn) May 2, 2016

13.

me chasing after the ice cream truck pic.twitter.com/uFh6F3ad7x

— batkaren (@batkaren) May 1, 2016

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tired of these mfs pic.twitter.com/NX6G3I2TMi

— Joe Dirte (@DickFooDog) July 16, 2019

16.

this is it. this is peak comedy. nothing will ever be funnier than this https://t.co/qNCwtrDtYm

— jen merritt!!! (@jennifermerr) June 23, 2019

17.

I'm sorry the what now pic.twitter.com/OpxK1FKiZY

— skepanie (@goodhairperson) July 16, 2019

18.

https://twitter.com/miracleunique_/status/1317192536293662720

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https://twitter.com/primawesome/status/1151132287884357633

20.

God: you’re my son

Jesus: do I have super powers 😀

God: you can turn water to wine, walk on water, uh bread

Jesus: :/

God: …fish

Jesus: so who’s my enemy

God: Satan. he has shapeshifting, fire, rock n roll, charm

Jesus: wow that’s cool 🙁

God: oh he’s super duper cool

— slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) June 13, 2019

21.

Me, in hell: I was told there would be a “special” place for me?

— Alice Wetterlund (@alicewetterlund) February 25, 2019

22.

when u got a promotion at work but the chardonnay is subpar & your marriage is slowly crumbling pic.twitter.com/Rwo8cuwURt

— lil jon lovitz(?) (@liljonlovitz) April 28, 2016

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Thinking about the time I drunkenly spilled an entire bowl of soup on my new macbook & then tried to tell the apple store it just broke out of nowhere & then the guy had to look me in the eye & say “we opened it up and there’s just…so much soup in here…like chunks of carrots..”

— Arianna Rebolini (@AriannaRebolini) October 17, 2021

25.

https://twitter.com/AbrasiveGhost/status/727636215978201089

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FIRST PERSON TO GET A CAT: haha this thing is an asshole I’m gonna keep it

— tater tot bros (@thetits) May 3, 2016

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MY DENTIST ASKED HIS ASSISTANT TO SUCTION (THE WATER OUT OF MY MOUTH)BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING TO ME SO I SUCKED HIS FINGER. IM MORTIFIED

— Sarah Lyons (@sarbeaaaar) January 3, 2017

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wheres my fuckin son pic.twitter.com/QM2nh5AYKs

— gary from teen mom (@garyfromteenmom) January 9, 2019

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I like it when they put 'the end' after a movie, so that you know not to stay sat in your seat for the rest of your life.

— a skeleton head (@Death_Buddy) May 2, 2016

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https://twitter.com/chrispaget1/status/1317878889297969164

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“Yea, when my mom fell down the stairs and broke her hip, we just shot her.” pic.twitter.com/7t197jKoD0

— Jason Mustian (@jasonmustian) April 16, 2018

36.

https://twitter.com/BrotiGupta/status/1450935243347611651

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https://twitter.com/pasxalle/status/1449897096102940685

38.

WOLF: I can't do this

FEMALE WOLF: Just focus on me, babe.

DAVID ATTENBOROUGH: The male penetrates the female

WOLF: He's so creepy

— Brian M. M. Doyle (@WritePlay) April 14, 2016

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Lord give me the commitment of a guy they forced into a polar bear costume going full method during an escape drill at a zoo pic.twitter.com/wPSBZ6hwpb

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) June 27, 2019

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3 am thoughts pic.twitter.com/apqXUw2Pcg

— Fairy Boy (@akafairyboy) October 19, 2020

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(to my date after each preview at a movie) the actual film will be much longer than that

— Bob Vulfov (@bobvulfov) May 2, 2016

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this still cracks me up pic.twitter.com/UJGEN34Yma

— tatyana 😉 (@tatbaee) November 21, 2021

50.

Me watching you in the Google Doc pic.twitter.com/sIXjpdAvtn

— Carly Severn (@TeacupInTheBay) October 25, 2021

51.

NYC LANDLORDS: It’s not that bad in the apartment.

THE NOT THAT BAD APARTMENT: pic.twitter.com/Yk3F48jzlP

— The Nostalgia Queen (@Snow_Blacck) November 4, 2021