Twitter Thread Asks “What Would You Steal To Mildly Inconvenience Your Victims?” And The Answers Are Hilarious (30 Tweets)

A Twitter thread by @ImNice_LikeRice asks:

“What would you steal from someone to mildly inconvenience your victims?”

I think I would take just the TV remotes. It would take so long for anyone to know something was up and for a while, all trust would be lost in the house. Taking something small from someone would be the ultimate way to make them think they’re losing their mind.

Some other borderline serial killers weighed in on what they would take. The results are pretty unhinged.


1. You wouldn’t notice for so long.

2. This is literally my current Tupperware situation. 

3. Not the strainer! 

4. When you go for the ice cream, it’s personal.

5. Spoken like a true boomer. 

6. The bottle opener is just evil. 

7. I wish you could set them to go off at 1 am. 

8. Thts Hrrbl

9. You’ll never guess it.

10. This woman wants to make her victims spend $8.

11. No hell like a wiggly seat. 

12. I actually love hard-boiled eggs, thank you.

13. You’ll never be on time again! 

14. Not the scooper! 

15. This one is a little too real for me. 

16. She has already been to my house.

17. True pain. 

18. Enjoy your pink sparkly gel pens. 

19. Enjoy your CRY now!!!

20. Enjoy loose batteries, idiot. 

21. This is evil. 

22. I would leave hand towels.

23. Jail for this person! 

24. Looking kinda dry today, Frank.

25. This person toddlers.

26. Leave a single crayon. 

27. So gross when they go to eat one.

28. We’re playing can roulette tonight! 

29. I would do the opposite.

30. My washer already does this for you.

Hannah Riley

Hannah Riley a comedy writer and content editor with ADHD living in Seattle, Washington.