Today we’re going to talk about red flags and toxic relationships.
When you ignore little problems they tend to turn into big ones and that maxim holds especially true for relationships. It’s easy to ignore your partner’s failings early on in a relationship. After all, you’re still getting to know each other and haven’t gotten a complete picture of who the other person is yet. Plus you’re swept up in a hormonal rush of feelings better known as the “honeymoon phase,” where you idealize the other person so wildly that even their most concerning personal traits seem more like lovable foibles than anything to worry about.
But that early-relationship innocence doesn’t last and Twitter user @imdatfeminist recently kicked off a rollicking conversation about relationship red flags by asking people to share their stories starting with the phrase “I should have known the relationship was toxic when….”
Hi loves, let’s start a very important thread on toxic relationships. We don’t enter relationships with a guide or ANY sense of what’s normal and what’s toxic and it’s left a lot of us lost and traumatized.
“I should have known the relationship was toxic when….” Add yours.
— Halima🧞♀️ (@imdatfeminist) February 17, 2020
The responses prove that you shouldn’t ignore those relationship red flags when they start waving.
He pointed out every attractive woman he saw
— Entitled to lateral support (@depreciationtap) February 17, 2020
I should have known the relationship was toxic when I believe his lies abt it ‘just being a catfish’ tinder account and he had saved nudes that were ‘from before me’ or he ‘didn’t ask for them, they were just sent’ (I’m dumb I know)
— Ailini (@ailini_xoxo) February 17, 2020
“I should have known the relationship was toxic when he accused me of being crazy everytime his lies were exposed”
— Charlotte ☁️ (@catchpole75) February 17, 2020
When she had me apologizing for walking on eggshells during the relationship yet she’s the one that had the explosive temper and would go off about anything
— Victor Von Boom 🇰🇪 🇺🇲 (@Lordacolyte) February 17, 2020
I should have known the relationship was toxic when I constantly had to ask permission to do the things, or talk to the people that I cared about because he was threatened or jealous 😬
— Mira (@ohheyitsmira) February 17, 2020
i should have known the relationship was toxic when he hugged me onto his lap, looked into my eyes, and said (while smiling) “you are not my person and you never will be”
— ☽☉☾ (@solelunastro) February 17, 2020
I should have known the relationship was toxic when I was begging for the person I cared about for communication and consistency. When everything and everyone else came before me and when I would express myself then I was the bad guy.
— girl with the dragon tattoo (@K1SSFROMAROSE) February 17, 2020
He would go through my phone every single time I went over for about 15 minutes, messages, photos,socials.. I was 15 and thought this concept was very normal.
— Soraya💃🏽 (@sorayamdaniel) February 17, 2020
When he kept telling me “I️ should” do something to better my appearance
— Essence Stanley-Savage (@E_Savage21) February 17, 2020
I found myself spending hours every day deciphering our texts, figuring out why he was acting the way he was (inconsistent and hot/cold) and writing whole paragraphs beforehand to get my point across without making him upset/blaming me/ giving me the silent treatment
— ʀคคѕнιкค ɢ๏ʏคʟ (@AdrenalineRaash) February 17, 2020