Max
Every week, it is our duty to spend obscene amounts of time scouring Twitter for the funniest shit we can find.
And every week we narrow it down to our 15 favorite funny tweets that popped up in our feeds.
Now, they might be from this week or they may have been retweets of some of very funny tweets from long ago.
Either way, please enjoy this extra special dose of 15 of the funniest tweets we saw this week that are surprisingly entirely Trump-free.
wife [whispers] Josh
me
wife *nudges me* Josh
me: Huh? What?
wife: You were explaining the plot to Space Jam in your sleep again— Josh (@iwearaonesie) July 24, 2017
I’m so excited to finally learn his last name. pic.twitter.com/5KEpejfs7W
— Brian Lynch (@BrianLynch) July 24, 2017
Spice up any Facebook comment with random quotation marks.
“Congrats” on your baby.
Congrats on “your” baby.
Congrats on your “baby”.— Bread Savage (@papasuncle) July 23, 2017
[I time travel to 1998]
Guy: This is the first showing of Mulan, how does that dude in the front row already know the words to all the songs— Hip Dad Online (@hardlyrelevant) February 9, 2016
Me: this week is going to be super busy and stressful, but I’ll get through it as long as I don’t have any distrac-
Period: HEY GIRL HEY— bananafanafofisa (@lisaxy424) July 24, 2017
“Act natural. Smile politely. Find the Constitution…” pic.twitter.com/25MXpdudDh
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) July 24, 2017
If you need a good divorce lawyer I can recommend Brian Wilson. He’s giving my ex citations
— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) July 23, 2017
When someone tells you their hands are cold, there’s a 95% chance they’re going to put their hands on you to prove how cold they are.
— Lindsay (@Rollinintheseat) July 25, 2017
my fav colour is also hitler pic.twitter.com/0tMnOGpsOG
— some quack (@hurlarious) July 23, 2017
Shout out to the man in the audience for Dunkirk who turned to his girlfriend + said “Dunkirk” when the word ‘Dunkirk’ came up on screen.
— Ben Peter Griffin (@GameGriffin) July 23, 2017
Well now let’s not pretend instant messaging wouldn’t have seriously improved outcomes for this couple pic.twitter.com/mudMiVaOCV
— Yara RodriguesFowler (@yazzarf) July 23, 2017
me: shania twain dominated 1997
guy who made fun of my shirt: just let me off the elevator, man
— brent (@murrman5) July 22, 2017
[Lincoln, back from the dead]
LINCOLN: Why are all the people I fought against now in my part-*plane flies overhead*WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!
— Glenn Loury 2.0 (@justabloodygame) November 10, 2015
*Flicks cigarette after a long drag* Here’s the thing. Poppa and momma bear slept in separate beds so maybe everything wasn’t “just right”
— Boog (@BoogTweets) July 21, 2017
I shouldn’t have wasted my whole weekend watching Law & Order but what’s done done is done done
— ELDGE (@Sickayduh) July 23, 2017
And if you need even more, you can check out the best tweets from last week.
