Yelp and Google reviews are a godless wasteland. All the bad reviews are people who weren’t shown enough attention as a child and the good ones were probably given 20% off by the business to say something nice. It’s important to keep in mind that the only people who take the time to leave reviews choose to spend their free time writing reviews.
Instagram account “Takeaway Trauma” shares funny restaurant reviews where the business roasted the author to a crisp. They all deserved it.