Ruin My Week
11.
“There was a chick that tried to steal a dudes sports car.
Dude busted the chick, she asked if there was anything she could do to make sure he didn’t turn her in.
He proposes getting some ass and he would even give her the car.
They f–k.
Then she asks for the keys and the dude digs in his bag and pulls out the ignition switch and wires (he stole the car).” –badlydisguisedtroll
12.
“Watch how easily the knife chops through the carrots.”
“I dunno, is there something bigger and harder you can show me?”
“This titanium rod” –little-bastard-man
13.
“ Knock knock
Who’s there
Sherwood
Sherwood who
Sherwood like you to come over a here and suck our c-cks?” (Russians in Who’s Nailin Paylin) –gsupanther
14.
“This doesn’t taste like meat popsicle. This tastes like d-ck!” –notabigdealnow
15.
“Are you serious? Right in front of my salad?”
Also, who can forget the classic; “We do have a couple lemon wh-res in this community.” –calamitycorvid
16.
“The first time I heard a chick say, “Oh yeah, give me that f–king baby batter!” I died. I couldn’t even finish I was laughing so hard.” –Hammose
17.
“Shut up before I come back there and slap your tits.” –Yer_Maws_Furry_Fud
18.
“There’s a scene of Abella Anderson having like a 4 some with another girl and two guys, basically they paired off. It’s been awhile but if I can remember it went like
Abella f–king her dude slow as f–k where she’s in control of the whole thing. Other girl is straight up getting destroyed.
Camera guy: Dude f–k her man. Don’t listen to her!
Guy tries to change positions to which I think was him wanting to pound Abella.
Immediately Abella puts her hands around his face and says: “no no, listen to me not him, slow is good.” then she starts giggling.
Then it was like 2 minutes of the other guy and the camera guy trying to force the guy f–king Abella to take her to pound town but the guy was so enthralled by her that they just went slow. ” –monkeybrain3
19.
“The Star Wars Porn Parody has the best exchanges for a porno
Luke: Uncle Owen, Aunt Beru needs a droid that speaks Bacchi
Owen: I need a droid to tell Beru to lick my black hole
Han Solo (talking about the Falcon): She may not look like much, but she’s fast enough for you, old man.
Obi-Wan (looking around the bar thinking Han is talking about a prostitute): …Really? Where is she?
-there are a lot more like this. Never laughed while fapping before, but I recommend it.” –T00Bytoon
20.
“Years and years ago I attended an anime convention and went to a hentai dubbing panel. The panelists explained that they had a LOT of freedom in their dubs, since hentai (and porn in general) isn’t usually known for its witty dialogue. They played a clip showing the difference between the original Japanese, which was basically a guy telling a girl to kneel before him and beg, and the dub, where the dialogue was roughly:
Guy: “Bark like a dog!”
Girl: Woof! Woof!
Guy: “Meow like a cat!”
Girl: Meow… Meow…
Guy: “Now… CLUCK LIKE A CHICKEN!!”
Girl (in an ungodly loud voice): B-GAAAAAWWCK!!!
The audience all cracked up, it was so unexpected and hilarious.” –AurelianoTampa
