16.
ah shit. I just remembered everything I have ever said and done. and it's not great
— eClaire (huh?) (@themanburglar) August 1, 2019
17.
I just want to say, if I don’t marry a man that does whatever weird shit our kids want than I have failed as a parent. pic.twitter.com/zK9bNZKTqF
— Teagan (@TeaganKMannyy) August 1, 2019
18.
https://twitter.com/ziwe/status/1156696418112999424
19.
kid got just so mad he couldn’t order a hot dog at this airport restaurant he yelled “hot dogs are my family” and then his mom immediately asked for a white wine and you know what i identify with both of them
— Kristen Arnett (@Kristen_Arnett) July 29, 2019
20.
men are fully 37 years old texting “sorry if it felt like u were feeling hurt by thinking that i treated you like a cum rag undeserving of respect,, i SAID in my tinder profile that i’m ~figuring things out and working on myself~ so kinda seems like your fault huh🤔”
— jamie (@veryhotmomm) July 31, 2019
21.
Can we stop screwing around and make Pringles cans big enough to fit an entire hand? We have the technology
— Elf on the hill (@Mom_Overboard) August 1, 2019
22.
https://twitter.com/ambermruffin/status/1155255452025966592
23.
me during morning shift: ay who the FUCK closed last night
me closing at night: this looks like a problem for the opener
— Neek (@babyltaly) April 18, 2019