When you’re preparing to give birth, one of the choices you can make is who can be with your in the delivery room. And in a situation where, no matter what your birth plan, anything can happen — that choice can mean a lot.
Most moms-to-be want their partner with them, but they can also want a friend or their mom or a doula. It’s possible, but unlikely, that they would want their mother-in-law.
One Redditor put her foot down about who gets to be in the delivery room, and when she told her husband that his mother was not welcome, he lost his marbles.
“For context, I (34f) am currently about 6 months pregnant. I am pregnant with me and my husband’s second child. Me and my MIL honestly have a pretty bitter relationship. She doesn’t approve of me or my family background. When I was having my first child my husband had asked me if I had considered letting my MIL be in the delivery room. I told him absolutely not and afterwards he never really brought it up. I ended up having my husband and my mother there with me as support.”
“Me and my husband are now discussing about who I want in the delivery room and I told him I was fine with the same arrangement I had last time. My husband was clearly not happy about the decision as I could clearly hear him mumbling something under his breath. I asked if he had a problem with the arrangement. He actually spoke and claimed he did. He stated it was massively unfair that I would allow my mother in the delivery room but not his.”
“He mentioned that since I got to choose who was in the delivery room last time he should get to choose who’s gets to be inside of the room this time. I told him he was insane if he thought I would let his mother see me in extreme pain. It would be an incredibly uncomfortable situation. He was incredibly upset and left the house. I’ve been trying his friends to see if they have seen him recently but without any luck.”
“I contacted my MIL but she said she had absolutely no idea that my husband wanted her in the delivery room in the first place and that she hasn’t heard from him in a while. I’m honestly kind of freaking out both from stress and guilt. I’m worried that my husband isn’t okay but I also can’t help but to feel guilty that I drove him away. I don’t know if I should stay with my current decision anymore. Please tell me Reddit. AITA?”
I’m sorry, but her husband disappeared after she told him her decision about her health? This is not what a pregnant woman needs as she prepares to give birth.
“When did squeezing a whole other person out of your vagina become a spectator sport? Of course you want your mom there (I think most women do if they have a nice relationship) for support. I’m older than you, but there have been the occasional day that frankly, I just want my mommy, damn it. And why would you want someone in the delivery room who doesn’t even like you when your cash and prizes are hanging out there for everyone to see??? NTA. Not by a long shot,” said SimplySam4210.
“As a married man with 3 kids: NTA. The woman giving birth gets to decide who is in their delivery room, full stop,” shared ITSlave4Decades.
“Hard NTA. During childbirth you are helpless and vulnerable. You should have ONLY the people YOU TRUST around you for support. If you have people you don’t trust (and don’t even like) there, it will only cause you more stress and problems. ‘He mentioned that since I got to choose who was in the delivery room last time he should get to choose who’s gets to be inside of the room this time.’ I’ve not heard anything more immature all week. Tell him that the first two kids you carried to term and delivered, he can gestate the next child and deliver it if he can figure out how,” said SirEDCaLot.
Idk whats up with hubby, but later in the post she said she even called MIL to see if she had seen or heard from him and she didn’t even know he wanted her in the delivery room! It sounds like he hasn’t even asked MIL if she wants to be there. Why is he dying on this hill before he even knows if thats something MIL wants to watch or take part in? NTA OP, I looooove my future MIL but I would never ever feel comfortable with her seeing my pussy, regardless of whats coming out of it,” said Waste_Delivery1960.
“Your husband doesn’t get a say in this. He doesn’t get to choose who is in there and frankly, he doesn’t get to choose whether or not he’s in there. If you need him there, he better be there and if you don’t want him there then he needs to suck it up. I am so sick and tired of men thinking they get a say in this. If my vagina is spread open and getting torn to sh*t, I CHOOSE WHO SEES IT. ME. God, this has riled me up. NTA and tell your husband to get a fecking grip,” said nibbler981.
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