People Are Sharing The Most Ridiculous Lies Their Parents Told Them As Kids (18 Stories)

11.

“Had a somewhat abusive father growing up. Only bone I ever broke was his handiwork. Both he and my mother insist to this day that it never happened. That I broke my foot in a marching band accident. Must have just slipped my mind. Wasn’t surprised when the term ‘gaslighting’ became more prevalent in society.” — sloth_eggs

12.

“My birthday is the 11th of July. The gas station 7/11 gives away free slushies on 7/11. At 7, 8, & 9 years old my parents just told me that the 7/11 wanted to celebrate my birthday by giving me free slushies and I did not question it. I thought the gas station just really liked me.” — anypebble

13.

“My mom has severe bipolar disorder, she once told me she would never yell at me again after a huge meltdown when I was very young, like 5 or 6. I thought of that every time she ever yelled after that my whole life, which was at least every other day. It’s just one of those things from childhood that always stuck with me.” — its_c0nrad

14.

“[My mom] would drive us to random huge nondescript buildings, screaming the whole time claiming that it was the orphanage & that she was getting rid of us, sometimes she would get out & physically pull our arms trying to rip us out of the car. If she was near the police station she would try it there too, telling us we were horrible kids & that the cops would understand and take us away from her. Which was super bold to me! it’s a shame she never got caught in the act abusing her kids.” — miserable-now

15.

“When I was younger i learned that mushrooms were a fungus and refused to eat them. My dad made me some soup with mushrooms in it and I threw a fit about eating it, so he inspected the bowl and told me they were whale toes. Apparently I was old enough to know that mushrooms were a fungus but not old enough to know that whales didn’t have feet.” —SelfBoundBeauty

16.

“We went to see the moon rise at the beach one evening when I was about 4. My dad told me it was a brand new moon and that the old one had fallen into the ocean. I’m in my 30s now and he still laughs about it.” — gagrushenka

17.

“My parents told me we had to leave the zoo because they let the animals out at closing time.” — agrips1

18.

“That the music meant the truck was out of ice cream.” — fierian

Featured Image: Unsplash

Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.