Parenting

Woman Finds Out Her Sister Is Pretending To Be The Mother Of Her Child

Having a baby is supposed to be an incredibly happy time for a family—but we all know that isn’t necessarily true.

One Redditor posted about how she is having a particularly terrifying time trying to figure out how to deal with a mentally unstable sister who is pretending the OP’s baby daughter is her own.

Apparently, this sister had dreams of starting a family, but the relationship she was in didn’t work out. Now, she must watch as her sister gets to live out her dreams. But instead of processing her grief and taking steps to move on, she is sliding further into a world that is not real. 

“When my (27F) fiancé and I first announced my pregnancy to my family, my sister (34F) was a little jealous, I’m assuming it’s because she was trying for a baby with her ex partner but they broke up because he was a cheat,” the OP writes.  

“I gave birth to my daughter seven months ago. Her name is Kaia. When I returned to work after 12 weeks of maternity leave, my sister offered to babysit Kaia once a week, which has been incredibly helpful.”

“Not too long ago, one of my close friends who also recently had a child approached me to tell me that my sister is in a mothers’ group on Facebook and she’s posting photos of Kaia and she’s calling my daughter HERS and she’s also calling her by a different name. My friend sent me screenshots of my sister’s posts and I was completely disturbed so I spoke to my fiancé and we both decided we had to take action immediately.”

“I went over to my sister’s and asked her directly about what she was posting on Facebook, she did not deny it and also had no explanation. Therefore I told her that she’s banned from seeing my daughter. My sister flipped out and said that I can’t take Kaia away from her and then called me a “selfish b*tch” and she started crying.”

“I have NEVER seen my sister act this was before, it was alarming. I ask her if there’s anything else I need to know because she may as well just spill everything, so she shows me a framed photo she has in her bedroom of her and my daughter and on the frame is written “mother and daughter.” I’m not going to lie, I did call her crazy and then I left and haven’t spoken to her since, although she continues to try and come over and calls me multiple times a day. My mind is an absolute mess. I don’t know where we go from here.” 

This is a really sensitive situation because clearly the OP’s sister is having an emotional or psychological crisis. But how distressing must it be to discover that her issue is manifesting through pretending to be the OP’s child’s mother?

What should the OP do (besides get her sister to a mental health professional ASAP)? 

“NTA at all. You need to protect your daughter. Your sister needs some serious help. What she is doing is not healthy at all. You could try telling her that she can see your daughter only after she gets into therapy,” advised anNonyMass. 

“NTA but your sister needs medical help. This kind of behavior is a red flag she could hurt herself or someone else. You said she’a never acted like this before. The sense of betrayal from her ex-partner cheating on and the sense of loss at not having the child she clearly wanted desperately were clearly overwhelming to her. You having a child triggered a complete break from reality. You need to gather as many family members, friends and others your sister knows as you can, have an intervention and get her into an in-patient mental health facility before someone gets hurt,” said GeneWho1sFrenchFries. 

“NTA but it sounds like your sister has some serious psychological issues and needs professional help asap. It will probably be safer for everyone to keep your daughter away from her and you may want to install a home security system as well as inform any other care givers that your sister does not have privileges regarding being around her. This type of thing is a HUGE red flag for mental health issues. If you can, you may want to encourage her to get help,” said LRose1825. 

“GET YOUR SISTER SOME HELP. Employ your parents if they’re around to help and any other family members. Do not let your sister see your daughter. Your sister needs help, serious help. This is the sort of thing that evolves into something worse if allowed to fester. How terrifying to find someone else, especially your family, claiming your child for themselves!! You did the right thing,” said DetectiveGurlKudo. 

“Protect your child. Your sister is creepy and delusional. She needs therapy. It would have only been a matter of time before she decided she is the real mother and tried to steal your baby. Left to her own devices, she would intrude upon your relationship with your daughter, and undermine it. Actually naming your child some other name!? Wow. That is scary. I would consider a restraining order on her. That is not normal. It isn’t loving or kind either, no matter what she claims. It’s obsessive and delusional. See if you, or someone who knows her, can get screen shots of her insane posts, as evidence. You might need therapy too, to process this trauma. What a terrifying experience! Yikes! Also, be prepared to have your family try to demonize you for protecting your child. Do not back down. A therapist will help you do that,” suggested Ragingredblue. 

What would you tell the OP to do in this situation? 

Enjoy More Trending News & Memes, Or Don’t, Your Choice

Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.