Emily Duprie
All girls know about the unspoken “Girl Code” that we faithfully follow throughout our day to day lives. Whether it be reminding your girl friend that her ex-boyfriend is the worst person you’ve ever met, or telling her that she has something on her chin while out at the club, “Girl Code” is just known among the feminine community. It’s important to look out for your fellow women always. We’re already being shamed and judged by a good amount of men around the world, the last thing we need is to judge and shame one another.
“Girls of Reddit, what is an unspoken rule of ‘Girl Code?’” – this online user took to one of Reddit’s most thought-provoking communities to ask about the unwritten rules that women tend to live by. The question has managed to receive over 30K upvotes and 7.8K worth of comments discussing the most important rules of girlhood. Below you can find 30 of what we thought were the most important rules to live by. Can you think of any others?
#1: Always Help Other Women Who Seem To Be In Trouble
You help other women who seem to be in trouble. When I was a teenager my mom and I went to Walmart to get groceries. We split up to save time and a man started stalking me through the aisles. I finally got out to a main area and saw a lady with two kids. Walked right up to her and stood as close as possible. She was confused but when I made a motion at the guy, she understood. She loudly thanked me for getting the milk and called me honey. Also referred to her son as my brother. Once the guy left she stayed with me until I saw my mom, and then stayed where she was until I got to my mom and motioned that I was okay. That lady deserves an award for helping me that day.
#2: Watch Over Other Girls’ Drinks When You’re At The Bar
My personal unspoken rule is keep an eye on other girls drinks when you are at the bar. Even if I don’t know them. I have asked random strangers to keep an eye on mine and they are always like, “GIRL YES we have to look out for each other!”
#3: If There’s A Period Stain On Someone’s Pants, Tell Them Immediately
If there’s a red spot on her pants you tell her discreetly and immediately.
EDIT: A lot of guys are asking what to do if they see a woman with a blood stain. You have two options. You could tell her yourself which may or may not be appreciated depending on the woman. Or you could simply ask another woman to tell her. I love how many guys wanna help look out for the ladies who end up in this predicament! 😀
#4: Once You Have Any Sort Of Link To A Guy, He’s Off-Limits To All Friends
Stupid or not, the original Girl Code is that once you have any sort of sexual/romantic link to a guy (even just saying you like him) he is 100% off-limits to all friends.
#5: If It Can Be Fixed In 5 Minutes Or Less, Tell Her; If Not, Then There’s No Need To Say Anything
The 5-minute rule. If it can be fixed in 5 minutes or less tell her!
If it can’t (bloat situation etc..) then there’s no need to say anything because it will literally only make her feel bad.
#6: Always Wait To Be Confided In
There is an almost imperceptible line between intrusive prurience and interest in the sex lives of your friends that’s defined by their inclination to share rather than you inquiring or making insinuations. Many friends will discuss sex candidly, others will use discretion, and some will resent the intrusion; always wait to be confided in rather than commit an indiscretion.
There are weird assumptions about the ‘sisterhood’ that we talk about penis sizes etc without reserve. This is untrue.
#7: Carry Some Extra Pain Killers
Also added to sanitary products, pain killers!! If you got em handy, help a b***h out!
#8: Always Give A Hair Tie If Someone Asks For It
if you’re wearing a hair tie on your wrist and someone asks for a hair tie, you give it to them (and accept that you likely will never see it again)
#9: Always Console A Crying Woman
Once I was sitting next to a young woman on the train and noticed she was quietly crying. I whispered “Do you need a hug?” She nodded “yes” and I hugged her tight. She thanked me and got off the train at the next stop. Another passenger asked what I said to her. I explained and told her sometimes you don’t need to pry but you can always give support. Made my day.
#10: Always Pretend To Know Each Other When A Guy Is Being Weird
You always pretend that you know each other when a guy is being a jerk and you (or they) need a way out of a conversation.
#11: If You See A Girl Doing Something She Might Regret The Next Day, Approach Her And Ask If She’s Okay
This one especially applies to college girls. If you’re at a party and you see a girl doing something she might regret the next day due to drinking WAY too much, you go over there and make sure shes okay.
#12: When Your Friend Gets Back With Her Ex, Support Her, But Also Tell Her The Truth
This should be to taught to everyone. Gaslighting is real but relies on the douchebag isolating you from other voices. We need to teach our kids this early and often, and friends and family need to be sure to always speak up. It needs to become very uncool for someone to not listen to their besties (or family if they are usually trustworthy) when they bring up concerns.
#13: If Your Friend Starts To Puke, Always Hold Her Hair Back
if a friend drinks too much and starts to puke, always hold her hair back for her
#14: “Human Wall” A Girl If The Only Option Is To Pee In Public
I was at a country concert one summer, and of course the ladies bathroom line was a mile long. While the mens line only had a few people. I spotted a group of girls in the mens line, thought WTH and joined them. We all formed a wall around each girl as she took turns squatting over a urinal bc the wait time for the stalls was too long. We were in and out in no time flat! The guys in line couldn’t believe what they were seeing 😂🤣
#15: If You Walk Into The Bathroom And Someone’s Being Quiet, Do Your Business And Leave Quickly
When I am in the ladies room at the mirror and someone’s in the stall, I always turn the sink on until I leave. Give them some privacy, even if it’s just to pee in peace.
#16: If There’s Lipstick On Their Teeth, Let Them Know
Lipstick on their teeth, eyeliner in the corner of their eye, skirt tucked into pantyhose. You let them know without making a huge deal about it.
#17: Don’t Get Together With Your Friend’s Ex
Do not….f**k your friends boyfriend or ex-boyfriend
#18: Protect Each Other
– Protect each other. Don’t care if it’s your sister or a complete stranger.
– text your friends to check if they got home safe
– stay with them while their uber or taxi etc comes
– Check over that message she is going to send to the guy she likes to see if it sounds okay. Some communications require a group effort
– Sanitary items to all vaginal having humans who need.
#19: Everyone Is Friends In The Bar Bathroom
Everyone is friends in the bar bathroom after 11, no matter what.
#20: If Someone Says They Love Something You’re Wearing, You Always Tell Them Where You Bought It From
This could be a trend across genders too but when a girl says they love something you are wearing you always tell her where you bought it and how much it was and ESPECIALLY if you got it for a discount.
#21: Tell Her When You See Him Cheating
Tell her when you see him cheating, snap a pic for proof if you can. I’ve lost friends for this but I’ll still do it every time.
#22: Don’t Post Group Pics Unless Everyone Approves
Do not post group pictures on social media with friends unless everyone involved knows & approves of said pic.
#23: If She’s Dating An Abuser, Make Sure She Knows She’s Welcome Anytime
If she’s dating a known abuser, take turns getting her out of the house. Play cards, shop for shoes, ask her to help you lay out the garden, make pie. Never broach the subject yourself – just make sure she knows she’s welcome any time, day or night, with or without advance notice.
#24: Always Respond To Any “Secret Codes” From Other Women
..my daughters have a literal code… if they ever text me the secret code, I will drop everything I’m doing and call them immediately, make up a major crisis and demand to come get them immediately. Make it 100% my fault, but give them an immediate out to any situation they don’t feel able to simply walk away from.
#25: Always Give Out Feminine Hygiene Products If Needed
Always give each other tampons and pads when needed.
#26: No Woman Gets Left Behind At The Club
No women left behind at the club. You look out for and take care of your girls and don’t let random men drag them away without their explicit permission.
#27: When You See “The Look,” You Step In
As far as I’ve ever seen, every girl knows ‘the look’. ‘The look’ is a look a girl gets on her face when she is in a situation that she doesn’t want to be in, it’s part ‘help me’ and part ‘get me out of here’.
When you see this look, you step in. Doesn’t matter if you know the girl or not.
#28: If A Girl Comes Over And Pretends To Know You, Don’t Ask Any Questions
If another girl comes over to you and pretends to know you, no questions asked we’ve been friends for 30 years and haven’t seen each other in 5.
And always give a tampon if you have one, and someone needs one.
#29: If Your Dress Has Pockets, You Let Them Know
Person 1: I like your dress!
Person 2: Thanks! It has pockets! <displays said pockets>
If your dress has pockets, you let them know.
#30: Never Shame Another Woman For How They Express Themselves
Don’t shame other women for how they express their femininity. Some women like pink, some don’t. Some women wear their emotions on their sleeves. some cover their bodies while others show theirs. Women get enough criticism, we don’t need it from each other.
