Dude Freaks Out When His Date Throws Her Pad In His Trash

One major warning sign that a guy might be not mature or possibly a misogynist is they get weird about periods. Instead of treating a period as a normal bodily process a woman goes through, they get grossed out or offended. They don’t want to see period products, won’t buy them for you, or complain about seeing them in the trash.

One Redditor, who had just started seeing a guy, reached out to ask if her date’s attitude towards finding her pad in his bathroom trash was normal.

And Reddit resoundingly responded that no, it was not, and she needs to throw this dude in the trash as well.

The OP explains that she met a guy on Tinder and seemed to really hit it off with him. They had lots in common and decided to meet for coffee at his house. She says they talked a ton and even held hands. They hung out for awhile, and inevitably she had to use the bathroom to change her pad because she was on her period.

“After I finish changing, I notice his trashcan is pretty full. Not sure what to do I wrap it in toilet paper and sort of smooth it into the trash can so it isn’t sitting on the edge. We hang out for about an hour more and be excuses himself to the bathroom. A few minutes pass by and he comes out, and says he needs to talk with me. He says that I shouldn’t of thrown away my pad because he might touch it when taking out the trash, and that it was gross and unsanitary. Apparently he saw that the trash looked different, unwrapped the toilet paper, and saw my used pad.”

“I was mortified. I apologized profusely, and he seemed to take it well. He just told me not to do it again, and if I needed to, just walk a few blocks to a nearby grocery store to change. I left after that, not think too much of it. However, I’ve recounted the events to a few friends, and they think he’s a major asshole. I’m not entirely sure. He was really kind about it, and didn’t seem to get angry, but I’m also starting to see their point too. It’s a normal body process for people with a uterus and I agree, should be more normalized. I’m just not sure what to think, and any judgement would be greatly appreciated.”

Yes, it’s absolutely not normal to ask someone to go to a nearby grocery store to change their pad. And if you think a pad is “gross and unsanitary” you might not be ready to interact with the rest of the world. Also, who rifles through their own trash?

“NTA. You didn’t put it bloody side up on the top. You wrapped it in toilet paper and pushed it into the trash. He had to go out of his way to find out what it was. His rummaging through the trash and unwrapping it made his complaint that he might have touched it taking out the trash utterly ridiculous. His behavior was really weird. Disturbingly weird,” noted NoiseProvesNothing.

“Not to mention that he suggest she walk a few blocks to change her pad. This guy’s a douche canoe. It’s bodily discharge. OP you need to drop this guy. He’s not worth your time or energy. Find a real man who when they see a used pad sees it as just that, a used pad. Not someone with such a frail ego,” said rummhamm87.

“It is very weird to unwrap a piece of trash to inspect it…then incredibly rude to confront a guest about her used menstrual products. And – did I read that right – to ask her to leave his house and walk to a store several blocks away when she needs to change a pad because he’s too precious to risk touching the tissue paper a pad is wrapped in?! OP. That is an absolutely ridiculous request. If you didn’t think there was anything wrong with that interaction or request, I’m worried for you. Nothing about that was ok. NTA, and this guy sounds awful. Just because he said it ‘nicely’ doesn’t make it a nice, considerate, or respectful conversation. Please raise your bar for dating partners, you don’t deserve to be shamed over having a menstrual cycle,” said DillyCat622.

“NTA. Your boyfriend boyquaintance went through the bathroom trash, took a piece of it out, unwrapped it, and he’s worried that what you did was ‘gross and unsanitary,'” stated WebbieVanderquack.

The OP updated that she had a conversation with the guy, and he basically confirmed Reddit’s suspicions that he flat-out awful:

“I actually texted him about that when I read your comment, and he have me a response. He told me that obviously if we were to get serious with each other, he’d just have me take birth control so I wouldn’t bleed everywhere. Yeah, I don’t think I want anything to do with this guy.”

Good call.

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