Patricia Grisafi
Since the COVID-19 pandemic, I’m used to requesting that delivery persons leave my order outside the door. But some people have regular interactions with the people who bring them food — a “Hi, how are you doing? Thank you! Have a good night!” relationship.
On Reddit, though, one user had a very strange interaction with a delivery person that left him in conflict with his girlfriend. Seems that the delivery person is either a total creep or friendlier with the girlfriend than the OP realized. In any case, after he slipped a note under her door, the OP called the restaurant and started some drama. Was he right or wrong?
“I (M28) was spending the weekend with my girlfriend at her place. We decided to order some pizza and she ordered from her usual restaurant. When the delivery guy arrived, I opened the door and he looked at me confused then proceeded to ask where (girlfriend’s name) was. I said ‘excuse me’ and asked why he was asking and he said nothing, it was just that he’s used to deliver pizza to her and this is the first he saw me so he thought she moved.”
“I told him she was busy then took the pizza and gave him money and while I was turning I saw him still standing. I asked how can I help and he said ‘don’t mind me I’m just standing here waiting.’ I told him he shouldn’t keep standing outside like that and he rudely said it wasn’t my property. I got angry but didn’t want to escalate so I said this wasn’t public property and he should LEAVE. I then went inside and shut the door.”
“10 minutes later, I caught a note getting slid under the door. I went to look and opened the door and saw the pizza guy going downstairs. I stopped him immediately and then read what the note said. He kept calling my girlfriend with her name and said that he was worried about her and how sad he was that he didn’t see her this time. I asked if he left this note just to confirm then told him I’d report him to his boss for this behavior. He said this wasn’t for me and I’m not the owner of this place so it was none of my business. We argued loud enough for my girlfriend to come out.”
“I told her what he did and she told me to leave it alone and go back inside. I said alright then, but soon as I walked in I called his workplace and wanted to speak to the manager. I told him what that guy did and he promised to take care of it and said that he won’t [be] working for them anymore. Don’t know if he was just telling me what I wanted to hear but when I told my girlfriend, she got mad saying I shouldn’t have done this and escalated by getting the dude fired. I asked if she was okay with what he did and she said no but now she can no longer order from this restaurant as they block any customer that complains. I said maybe good riddance then? She said I overreacted and had no right to do this when it’s not even my apartment. I didn’t know what to say but she completely shut down and refused to talk to me except to say I’m being too insecure and petty.”
It seems like there’s some information missing here, like what the note said! But do Redditors agree that the OP was being “insecure and petty”? Or did he see a threat when his girlfriend did not?
“I feel like the content of the note really matters here, like big difference between “hey hope you are doing ok, here are some coupons for always being a good tipper” which is a bit weird, but harmless and a note that is like “I know you are hiding from me because you can’t resist me, I’ll be waiting outside” which is straight up creepy,” said AccountWasFound.
“It’s your girlfriend’s apartment. Your girlfriend placed the order. It is your girlfriend’s relationship with the pizza guy (not implying anything intimate here, just the routine interactions we have with the minor players in our lives). The note was to your girlfriend. Your girlfriend asked you to drop it. If you girlfriend had been upset by this guy’s behavior, I’d say not the ah. In a vacuum it sounds creepy. However, the only time she indicated she didn’t approve of this was when you were in a white hot rage immediately after having gotten someone fired, which, you know, isn’t when someone is going to say they like someone else’s attention. You took it upon yourself to grab your girlfriend’s letter without even letting her read it first. You took it upon yourself to chase some guy away. You took it upon yourself to get the dude fired even after your girlfriend told you she wanted you to leave it alone. You LIED to your girlfriend about agreeing to leave it alone. So this didn’t happen in a vacuum. Maybe she’s been complaining to the delivery guy about her controlling boyfriend and he legitimately was worried about her? I’ve never even met you and you sound controlling and worrisome to me. If you are worried that someone you loved is being stalked by a creeper and doesn’t realize it, the way to handle it is a conversation, not by being even more creepily possessive and scarier than the potential stalker. If you are worried that your girlfriend and the pizza guy are getting too flirty, the way to handle it is with a conversation with your girlfriend, possibly a breakup, not by getting the guy fired,” explained winnie_the_grizzly.
“OP has some serious anger issues but pizza driver is fucking weird bro,” observed QuartzPigeon.
“Man…this is a hard one to judge because I get why you reacted the way you did because pizza guy is way out of line but I also get where your girlfriend is coming from. Women have to be very very careful in how we interact with men, especially men who know where we live. You now have a situation where a man who makes bad choices when it comes to interacting with women has now possibly been fired from his job, he knows it is because of your girlfriend and he knows where she lives. He has the potential to present a very real threat to your girlfriend’s safety. So I guess slightly YTA because you escalated the situation every step without taking in account the possible danger your girlfriend will now be in…but its not your fault you didn’t realize this because you don’t have the experience women do with having to be careful in how we deal with men because we have to consider whether he is going to hurt us,” said imaguestage.
“NTA, I am a pizza delivery driver / maker….He was WAY out of bounds. And super creepy that he interacts with regulars that way, I am always nice and chit chat, but I never stay longer than a minute or so after the transaction, I’m on the clock and have deliveries to make, I’ll see you next delivery,” said DiggityGiggity8.
“NTA. He crossed a line with the note. Friendly banter with the delivery guy doesn’t make you a friend and he shouldn’t have acted like a jealous stalker. GF needs to recognize that his behavior was scary. This person knows where she lives. I hope this is the last you see of him and him getting fired doesn’t make things worse,” said KingsRansom79.
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