Patricia Grisafi
Men, listen. Don’t get defensive. You do some creepy things that scare women. It’s time to get aware and change your behavior.
Calling out to women in the street? Stop. Following women to get their number? Don’t do it. Blocking a woman in a room or standing in front of a door? Why are you doing that? Refusing to take “no” for an answer? Come on.
On Reddit, women are sharing things that men do that scare them—and it’s not ideal that the same things keep coming up.
Do better! You can change!
1. Following women to their car
“Following you to your car to get your number. Don’t. Ever. Do. That.” — dadadawn
2. Blocking doors
“Standing in doorways/blocking exits.” — justwannahelp722
3. Asking strangers for personal info
“Flirting is fun so long as you don’t ‘flirt’ by asking me where I live, and if I live alone, and (as an expat) if I know people in the area. If you want to chat, flirt, get to know me? Don’t start with the questions that set off alarm bells in my head.” — wanderingprose
4. Being overly friendly or touchy
“I’ve been approached several times in public by random men who say they want to be friends with me.
One leaned in really close to have a conversation and asked me where I was from and where I live. Another grabbed my hands and remarked on how soft my skin is. Another one literally locked arms with me and dragged me to a coffee shop to ‘get to know me’ and then later told me to come with him to a more private place for a view of the city.
I weakly joke about it sometimes but in the moment it really does make me nervous. I don’t know if I just look really unimposing (I’m an Asian woman but I’m taller than average?) but I’m not sure why it happens. Regardless, please don’t just grab random women, even out of friendliness, and respect personal space.” — kerbula
5. Bringing up the r-word
“While talking online and I say, ‘I don’t know about meeting up’ and their response is ‘You are more likely to be raped by someone you actually know in person.’ Yup… Not meeting up now.” — curious-lycanthrope
6. Complimenting strangers
“Calling them beautiful as much as possible. Once or twice is nice, if you know them, but if you don’t know the guy and he says it too much it freaks me out.” — toitnups1111
7. Using your size to intimidate
“Blocking my path or physically holding me in place if they are not done talking to me. Basically, using more strength/size to restrict my motion in any way.” — uncool4skool
8. Approaching women in tight spots
“Hit on you in locations where you cannot escape (enclosed places like elevators, or work places).” — ImproveOrEnjoy
9. Telling them how “nice” you are
“Any time someone tries really hard to convince me he’s a ‘nice guy.’ Every guy I’ve met that desperately brings it up every chance he gets isn’t usually very nice. It always makes me wonder what are they trying to hide? Like why do I have to think you’re nice? Prove it with your actions, don’t tell me repeatedly.” — ElectricPinkMango
10. Physically “joking” with them
“‘Jokingly’ using your strength to move me or keep me from moving. If I want to go home and you’re pulling me back I am not actually going along with it, you are stronger than I am and I literally cannot leave.” — esthermyla
