Being a liquor store clerk has to be one of the more interesting jobs. You get to see a stream of truly interesting characters filing in and out, learn how to spot fake IDs, and you’re probably hyper-aware of the alarm behind the register.
Check out some of these wild stories posted on u/FallingStar2016‘s AskReddit thread asking:
“Liquor store employees of reddit, what is the craziest instance of underaged kids trying to get booze you’ve ever encountered?”
1. Well.
A 10-year-old boy walks up to the counter with a bottle of whiskey. I laugh and just say no. I’m thinking it’s such a young kid that it had to be a lazy and/or a drunk parent sending their kid in thinking it’s no big deal.
“No?” “Yeah, no. You’re a small child. I can’t sell you that.” “Here’s my ID.”
The 10-year-old boy was actually a 23-year-old woman. I did the rest of the transaction in silence.
2. No ID
Me – Do you have ID
Him – *hands it over*
Me – This says you’re 17
Him – I must have picked up my brothers ID
Me – No, it has your face on it
Him – We’re twins
Me – Twins are usually the same age
He left quickly after that
3. OOPS!
A tiny girl of about 15 comes in and tries to buy a case of beer. I ask her for ID.
She laughs and says, “Are you serious?” I nod apologetically.
She says: I left it in the car. “Sure,” I think. “Left it in the car like every other kid around.” She runs to her car, comes back in with her ID.
She’s 34. Oops!
I’m sooo bad at guessing people’s age.
4. Fake tat
I had a guy come in to try to buy booze with an absolutely terrible fake tattoo (tattoos and alcohol have the same age restrictions here). I’m guessing he thought that if he had massive tribal tattoos on his arm we would just assume that he was old enough. He’d clearly done them with a felt tip pen, but it was a hot day so the sweat was making them drip down his arm.
5. Sixteen!?
I college I worked at a liquor and beer place adjacent to a grocery store. Lots of regulars and people from the neighborhood. For several weeks I had been serving this one guy: pleasant, polite, early 20’s, 6’4”, maybe 260lbs. One day after he left, this older dude who was in line came up to the counter and said, “You know that kid is only 16, right?” I couldn’t believe it. Apparently, he rotates from store to store until he gets caught. Sure enough next time he came in I asked for ID. He just cursed a bit and stormed out of the store.
6. Damn.
I was a junior high teacher and worked at a liquor store in the evenings. A student came in while I was there. He took one look at me and turned around and left with a muttered “damn.” It was all over the school the next day and I wasn’t the one who told.
7. ID of a buddy
I worked at a liquor store right outside of the university I was attending. had a dude come in, had to be like 18/19. he comes up and gives me the ID of a guy I grew up with… I just started laughing.
8. MATH.
The guy comes in, says he forgot his ID, but he’s 25, and “couldn’t you just give me a break, I come in here all the time, I was in here like two days ago.”
The cashier keeps saying no, sorry, etc, and the guy keeps getting more desperate.
Guy eventually goes “dude I’ve been coming here for ten years!”
To which the cashier just goes “didn’t you say you were 25?”
9. Late 50s
Worked at a small store and I was required to card all who looked under 30. Asked a lady who appeared to be about 18 for a card and she laughed and said she left it at home (a lot of underage people will do that). She returns next week with her ID, I was sure it was a fake but no she was in her late 50s.
10. Just come tomorrow
Worked at a liquor store but this was a case of underage cigarettes, not booze. A 17-year-old kid comes in at 7 pm. The next day is his 18th birthday, which I knew because I checked his ID before selling him a pack. I used to try to buy smokes at 17 so I knew the deal and I wasn’t mean I just laughed and said “Sorry man, I’ll be more than happy to sell you a pack tomorrow. Happy birthday in advance though!” And this kid legit cussed me out for ten minutes straight… instead of coming in the next day, he got 86’ed from the only liquor store in town – by the owner who was there at the time.
11. No strategy
Two guys tried to buy beer. I asked them for ID, they legit gave me their actual IDs. Like a vertical ID that had their dob clearly making them under 18. When I told them no they were like “really man, can’t you just be cool?” Like their whole strategy was to hope that the clerk would just be a cool guy.
Hey, at least they were honest.
12. Whatever, douche
I worked at a store where the liquor closet was in the back and you had to be 21 to go down the hallway to it. I check this one kid’s ID and it’s obviously fake, I confiscate it and he’s like “whatever douche.” Proceeds to walk back into the liquor closet, grab a 5th of sh*tty vodka, and place it in the counter then demand I sell it to him. My coworker and I were dying laughing at him.
13. Yes.
Not really wild but he came to the counter with a bottle of something.
I asked him for ID, he’s reply was something like “is this how you treat all your customers?”, in some kind of tone like it was insulting to ask for ID.
I said yes.
We both kind of stood there for a few moments and he asked if I wasn’t going to sell him anything. Not without ID, and then he walked out.
14. Aw?
This guy is out with his girlfriend, and she’s the one who goes to purchase the wine coolers.
She looks young (20-22 years old), so I asked for ID. She gives me her driver’s license and she’s 29 years old.
As the guy is leaving, he goes to me, smiles, and says “Dude, you just made my night.”