11. Stupid Person
“You aren’t the stupidest person on the planet. But you better hope to god they don’t die.” parthaenus9556
12. Childhood cut
You weren’t dropped when you were a child, cause you were never held. AndromedonConstellon
13. Cricket insults
In cricket especially in Australia it is common to sledge (insult them) opponents to put them off their game. I think it was Australia vs Zimbabwe and the Australian bowler was trying to put the batsman off. The batsman had a stocky build so the bowler asked him “how did you get so fat”, as Zimbabwe was more known for starvation than obesity. The batsman came back quick as a flash he replied “everytime I fucked your wife she gave me a biscuit”. Costello666
14. Poor Tracy
Coworker to supervisor: “Tracy, you were voted the second best boss in the plant!”
Supervisor: “Wow! Who got first?”
Coworker: “All the other supervisors tied for first.”
I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain it to you. ThrowMeAwayAccount08
16. My heart!
“You aren’t acting like the person Mr. Rogers knew you could be.” BIGJFRIEDLI
17. Extra medium
I quit smoking, so started putting on some weight, and one of my boss/friends said I needed to start buying “extra-medium” shirts.. it was literally a perfect dig.. Fragrant-Shame3318
18. Second worst
This isn’t the worst chicken I’ve had, but it is the second worst. Gamer_ely
19. Good for her!
One of my good friends (Female, early 30s) got us all into Fortnite during quarantine. We once ended up with a rando in our squad, a little squeaking 12-year-old (a gross assumption) with a foul mouth and an attitude. The first time my friend called out on comms, the kid made a tasteless and vulgar comment about her being a woman. When she began to ask him to correct his behavior, he told her to “shut up, hoe!”
She quipped back without hesitation, “Shut up, kid, before I bang your dad and call you my stepson!”
20. Sorry, plant.
Go over there and apologize to that plant for wasting the oxygen it is working so hard to produce. sunkenvet