Patricia Grisafi
Ah, revenge. It doesn’t even have to be epic. Some people get satisfaction from the pettiest types.
On Reddit, folks are sharing the funniest examples of petty revenge they’ve ever experienced.
From adding hot spice to a sandwich for a sandwich thief to messing with computer equipment to drawing all over a creep’s face, these examples of petty revenge are just sweet enough and satisfying without actually blowing up anyone’s life.
1. Spicy Sandwich
“This happened a while back, study hall in 8th grade actually. I always brought two small sandwiches to school so I could have one at lunch and one in study hall since our teacher let us eat in that class. One day as I was about to eat my Sandwich, I get up to use the bathroom. As I walk back in the classroom, I see the kid in front of me eating my sandwich. I was pretty annoyed but nothing serious at this point, so I confront him politely and he denies it completely. I left my sandwich on my desk the next day just to make sure it was him, and what do you know, it is. So on the third day, I hatched a plan. I put habanero cheese on my sandwich, and then doused it all in ghost pepper sauce. That sh*t was everywhere, but it luckily didn’t smell spicy. I get to study hall and my plan works flawlessly. I leave my trap sandwich on my desk and get up to use the restroom. This time I take as long as I can, and end up wandering the halls of the school. I did this because my study hall teacher was anal about the hall pass, and only one guy was allowed to leave the class at a time, even for water. After about ten minutes I come back into the class to be greeted by the sandwich thief crying hysterically with a bright red face waiting for the hall pass. He was in the bathroom for the rest of the day.” — iwmcguy
2. Erased All Her Shows
“My Ex cheated with a married man. He now lives with her. He is a POS…but anyway, I still have login for her DVR. I logged in, erased all her shows, then recorded only the show ‘Cheaters.’ Petty, but it makes me laugh.” — redman2532
3. Two Free Goats
“A guy at work pissed me off. I placed this Craigslist ad with his phone number. 2 free goats. Hablas espanol. He spent the rest of the day getting calls every 15 minutes or so.” —JoeySalamander
4. Teacher’s Revenge
“My mom had a fantastic one. She was a language teacher at my high school and years after I had graduated, she called me kind of upset because a group of guys was trying to make her look dumb. The class was supposed to write one of those team dialogues in Spanish, and had a week or so to prepare it, then had to perform it in front of the class. When she called for them to do theirs, they said, ‘But we already did ours, we’re not doing it again.’ She said, ‘You definitely didn’t do it, I don’t have any record of it here and I would remember it if you had.’ They refused to do it, insisting they already performed it and that it was her fault she didn’t take notes/scores down. She was feeling puzzled and questioning herself, when one of the good kids came and said, ‘They didn’t do it – they were bragging about making you look stupid and threatened the whole class if they told you anything. But please don’t tell them I told you this, I don’t want any problems with them.’ (These were those stereotypical dumb jock types who everyone was scared of for whatever reason). My mom was really into yoga at the time and got a great idea while meditating. She went in the next day and said, ‘Boys, I owe you an apology. I found my notes on your presentation and I do remember it, I don’t know how I forgot!’ She went on to describe all the grammatical mistakes they made, that their dialogue hadn’t been as long as required, that they didn’t include the necessary vocabulary, etc. All made up. She failed them all on the project and they couldn’t do a thing about it without admitting they’d made it all up.” — a-dizzle-dizzle
5. Wet The Bed
“When I was a kid I had a bed wetting problem. I am not ashamed of this now, as thousands of other kids have had the same problems… at the time however, this was humiliating. My younger brother started telling other kids around school how extensive the issue was. I was mortified. Even after our mother told him to knock it off, he continued. So I decided to level the playing field. The whole ‘hand in cup of warm water’ deal didn’t work. I stood over him as he slept one night and pissed on him. The next morning, my mom was horrified and wound up taking a call from my grandmother. ‘I don’t know what to do, now BOTH of them are pissing the bed,’ she explained, clearly frustrated. After a few more times of ‘framing’ my brother as a bed wetter he completely stopped using my embarrassing problem as entertainment.” — hardybe
6. Double Click
“Speeding up a coworker’s double click speed and watch him squirm when his normal double clicking speed isn’t working.” — reloadingnow
7. Stealing An Unfinished Book
“Obligatory ‘not me, but’: This is a little long but one of my all time favorites. In Texas, there is a law that allows the US to take certain possessions to satisfy a debt owed, such as from a lawsuit. So this defendant had been committing Medicare fraud, got caught, has to pay back the money. He’s also a total prick during the lawsuit — obstructionist, rude, etc. When the US finally has its judgment and he’s pleading poverty, the US Attorney that ran the suit basically ends up walking through the ‘impoverished’ guy’s multi-million dollar house to hand pick what is going to be seized. He takes the big ticket items that he’s allowed, but it’s not going to be enough — so then he just starts taking little shit to piss the guy off. Book half-read on the nightstand? Gone. Can’t take the garage — but you can take the garage door-opener, so…gone. I don’t know what else he took but I think the idea is brilliant. The book would piss me off so much.” — DeaconFrostedFlakes
8. Sucker Punched
“My favourite childhood story. So I was an AP kid, and had a bunch of AP friends, and also was in sports and theater. I had a large bunch of friends in nearly every cliche. Anyway. One day, one of my friends gets sucker punched in the halls by some dickwad. Becuase of the school’s zero tolerance policy, getting sucker punched carries the same punishment as sucker punching. So my friend and the dickwad both got in school suspension, but only one of them was punched on the face. I thought that was a litte bit unfair. So I got my friends together, and they got their friends together, and every week, one of us would sucker punch dickwad. Every week, one of us would have ISS, and so would dickwad, but since we are many, none of us went to ISS twice. Dickwad on the other hand missed so much class, that he had to retake the grade.” — whoshereforthemoney
9. Computer Trouble
“I once had a colleague I hated (he was very condescending and really arrogant), so I put an extra Bluetooth receiver in his computer for a computer mouse and kept the mouse in my drawer. I would just open my drawer and it would mess his shit right up. Kept it going for like 2 months. He was about to murder the world when I thought I better stop.” — [deleted]
10. Not Exactly Teamwork
“This happened to my SO when he was at university – another comment here reminded me of it. His class were doing presentations in pairs, and he got paired with some girl who didn’t bother to bring notes or research information for their presentation. She instead let him do all the work, and any slides she did were made from his notes and research. He complained to his tutor and she told him, ‘Don’t worry, leave it to me.’ And then the day of the presentation comes. They present, and then at the end the tutor asks the girl a question. If I remember correctly the question was something like, ‘Is there any evidence to suggest that some cultures are more prone to mental health problems?’ And the girl answered no. The tutor then asked my SO the exact same question, and because he’d actually read the research on the topic, he was able to list of several studies that showed that some cultures are in fact more prone to mental health issues. The girl glared at him the entire time he answered the tutors question. Pretty sure she ended up with a D, while he got an A or B.” — Lil-Night
11. Misspelled Name
“On every email I send, I attach my name, company, position, etc. ALL the time people will respond ‘Thank you Sara’…but my name is spelled with the ‘H.’ I have started to reply to them leaving off a letter of their name. ‘No problem Rene’ ‘Have a good day Jon.’ They probably think I am an idiot, but it is worth it to me.” — porcelain_queen
12. Sabrina The Teenage Witch
“When I was a kid I got the Sabrina the Teenage Witch ‘Handbook’ – it was full of kiddie experiments and stuff and was pretty fun. My older sister had upset or annoyed me about something, so I tried out one of the ‘tricks’ from the book, you fill a cup with water and some corn kernels, put some tinfoil on top of the cup, the kernels eventually pop and it makes noise against the tinfoil. I put it under her bed, it takes a few days to ‘work,’ so I completely forgot about it, until one night I woke up to my two sisters whispering – it had popped in the middle of the night and she thought there was a rat under her bed.” — caca_milis
13. Crushing Lunches
“Someone in my office would always crush lunches with his gigantic ass lunch box. Either he ate bricks or lead, I don’t know, but I always came to the office fridge and found that my lunch was in pieces. So, after three bouts of this, and numerous notes from myself and other colleagues, I carefully removed his lunch box, emptied the contents (a gigantic sandwich, a Twinkie, chips, some vegetable pieces, and a few other bits), and ran over them with my car. I carefully packed it back in, and put it back. He kept his lunch in a cooler by his cube from then on.” — AR3Leatherworks
14. Stealing Flip Flops
“We were sitting by a pool once, and a woman stood over my wife and started spraying sunscreen all over herself – and my wife. We asked her nicely to please move and she ignored us and kept spraying. When we left, I took one of her flip flops with me.” — whereyouatdesmondo
15. Pubic Hair Everywhere
“Ok this one is pretty gross…but growing up in a house of only girls, personal space does not exist. We used to bathe in front of each other, and even use the bathroom in front of each other. There are no boundaries. My younger sister was notorious for shaving in the tub and not rinsing it out when she was done. Pubes. Everywhere. One day she was taking a bath and I asked her to rinse when she was done, because I planned on taking a bath afterwards. She told me to f*ck off. So I reached in my pants, snipped off a chunk of pubes, tossed them in the tub with her, and walked out.” — hollypopasaurus
16. Retake The Class
“I had a guy in school who would always skip class and then ask for my notes. We had a group project worth almost 40% of our grade and he did zero work, and the prof told me tough luck. Instead of just saying no the next time he asked for notes, I took the low road and began giving him edited versions. I would leave items out of lists, incorrectly define things or just straight up write stuff that makes no sense. An example of the crap I would put in: To calculate return on investment, subtract your yearly earnings from your current bank balance, then multiply by Echer’s factorial (4.22). If he had even once bothered to crack the text he would have figured it out, but that apparently would have been too much effort for him. He retook that class.” — failing_forwards
17. Lipstick On Your Face
“A drunk guy harassed me on the tube one night in my way home. About two mins after his last “f*cking stuck up bitch” he fell asleep. Deeply asleep. So I took out my lipstick (gorgeous coral colour) and drew all over his face. Yes, I may also have been drunk. I think I was trying to read my book with one eye closed to help me focus…yep. So I got off at Acton, and watched him snooze away down the Heathrow branch. Arsehole. I hope he woke up with lipstick all over his pillowcase and a pissed off missus.” — RipleysBitch
Featured Image: Unsplash
