There are a lot of people claiming to be psychology “experts” on TikTok (looking at you, wellness gurus) — but there are also actually professional psychologists on the site who aim to help clear the noise around the subject.
Francesca Tighinean has a bachelor’s in psychology from City, University of London, and spins popular topics with educational twists. Her thoughts are very popular on TikTok.
Bored Panda talked to her about her experience on TikTok. Regarding whether or not her work is accurate, she said, “The best way to see if something is true or not is to test it yourself. I encourage my followers not to take my word for it, but to test all of the techniques and advice that I give them and see if it works. Also, do your own research and check what other sources are saying. Everything that I say is backed up by research, books, courses, and personal experience,”
She shares some A+ tricks on how to get others to like you — check out some of her best below. All are sourced from francesapsychology on TikTok.
1. Wait
Instead of responding immediately after someone says something to you. Wait a couple of second.
This makes them feel like you’re really thinking about what you’re going to reply. And it makes you seem like a better listener
2. Affirmations
In a conversation, when someone is talking, nod your head in affirmation.
This will do so many things to their brain. First of all, it will give them that feeling of validation. It will make them feel like you’re truly listening to them and it is that feeling of validation that we search for unconsciously, that we got from our mom, and we’re searching in our partner, we’re searching in other people. So it becomes really addictive when you do this, and you make people feel validated.
3. A favor
Ask people to do a small favor for you
This is called the Benjamin Franklin effect. Say something like: Hey, can you pass me the salt please? Their subconscious mind think that they like you bc they’re doing you a favor
Francesca has over 400,000 followers and 4.3 million likes over her videos. She told Bored Panda that she has been passionate about psychology since she was 15.
“My first seminar was so life-changing and had such a positive impact on me and my mother that I was inspired to become a motivational speaker and life coach that weekend. A short time after, I won a scholarship at a Tony Robbins camp in San Diego for teenagers. That was my first contact with Tony and NLP [neuro-linguistic programming].”
4. Compliments
We like people that like us. Knowing how to appreciate someone and make compliments will make them like you more. Notice someting special about them or say something like “I really like the way you think”
5. Give Credit
When you’re talking in a group, give credit and compliment other people. For instance, if you’re saying a story, highlight something that someone did well. People will want to stick around you more.
6. Use their name
Call people by their name
We absolutely love hearing our name called by someone else, because it makes us feel important and appreciated
“I started doing public speaking, and at the age of 17, I was already being invited as a speaker to different conferences and by companies such as Ecco Shoes to do self-development workshops. My path was very clear,” she said to Bored Panda.
7. Ask for advice
Ask people for their advice. Making them feel like their opinion matters. According to reasearch done by Katie Liljenquist makes them form a commitment to you and makes them like you more.
Example:“What do you think I should order?”
“I think you should get the vegan burger, it’s really good”
“Ok, I’ll get that! thank you!”
“Aw I feel like I like you already”
She shares on her website that she began her self-development journey at 15 and “[e]ver since then, I never stopped learning and growing.”
8. Palms
When you’re talking to someone, always show the palms of your hands.
This communicates to their subconscious mind that you have nothing to hide, that you are open, that they can trust you and you are their friend.
9. Match
When you talk to someone try to match your body language and talk at the same volume and speed as they are.
This will tell subconscious mind that you are like them and they will trust you more