i introduced noam chomsky at a talk he did. afterwards, i said ‘hey noam, can i get a selfie with you?!’ and he was like ‘a…a…a wha–‘ and i clicked
— Aisha Ahmad (@aishaismad) May 14, 2020
Jodie Foster asked me where the Nintendo DS’ were in a Target.
— Timothy Simons (@timothycsimons) May 14, 2020
Oh. Pierce Brosnan, Pink, Justin Theroux, and Charlize Theron have pet my dog. Probably more but I’m bad at faces. He’s a starfucker.
— Lauren Hough (@laurenthehough) May 14, 2020
It was so awkward for me. I thought I was interrupting you and the buttons.
— Paul Scheer (@paulscheer) May 14, 2020
Walked past the black Allstate guy with a blonde 1/2 his age in West Hollywood.
— Nayamka Roberts-Smith, LE (@LaBeautyologist) May 14, 2020
I once saw Arnold stuck in a tux while trying it on at the Armani store in Beverly Hills. He had the jacket on but couldn’t get it off and he was waving his arms around and yelling.
— LHD (@lkhd7) May 14, 2020
I walked in on Meatloaf masturbating in a Bubba Gump Shrimp bathroom
— Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein) May 14, 2020
Zooey Deschanel being mean to me at Starbucks
— cinnamon bun (@notsofiacoppola) May 14, 2020
Claire Danes looking for a seat on the Amtrak Empire service upstate, with a kid and a small dog.
— Lizzie O’Leary (@lizzieohreally) May 13, 2020