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People Are Roasting This Dystopian COVID Chuck E. Cheese Commercial

Even though the pandemic isn’t over and in the U.S. deaths are close to 200,000, the gears of capitalism grind on. Companies that were shutting down or offering hazard pay to essential workers are now throwing their doors open again to the reluctantly masked public. We’re seeing commercials that openly acknowledge coronavirus and it’s frankly unsettling. Also, inevitable.

While some places are trying to be tasteful about asking customers to come risk it all for their products, other companies are incapable of being tasteful because by their very nature they’re disgusting. I’m talking about Chuck E. Cheese, a place where exhausted parents bring their kids so they can run around, scream, touch all the same buttons with sticky hands, stuff themselves with dairy and bread, then pass out in the car on the way home. There aren’t many institutions as perfectly designed to become a petri dish as one of these restaurants, yet they’re reopening.

Podcaster Justin McElroy shared a video that looks like a TV being filmed featuring a new commercial for Chuck E. Cheese. In it, the franchise mascot, a big rat, turns the lights back on and lets the kids and the parents in:

The ad assures everyone that everybody will be exhibiting perfect mask usage inside the Chuck E. Cheese locations and everything will be getting regularly wiped down. Uh-huh. Sure.

The commercial is kind of funny for being so outrageous, but McElroy wasn’t amused:

The most obvious joke is that a rat always spreads the plague, but a lot of people also just commented that even on its best day, a Chuck E. Cheese is one of the dirtiest places on earth:

I’m sure there are parents who do not give a crap about how foul it is to take your kid to a place with a ball pit during a deadly epidemic, and that’s why these places should remain closed. The coronavirus doesn’t care that you desperately need to get out of the house. Just say no to Charles Entertainment Cheese and his arcade of disease.

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Aimeé Lutkin