Some tweets are funny, funny.
I prefer tweets that are true, funny.
Relatable.
Almost personal attacks on everything I stand for.
These are those tweets.
1.
Me, in hell: I was told there would be a “special” place for me?
— Alice Wetterlund (@alicewetterlund) February 25, 2019
2.
I am a:
⚪️ Man
⚪️ Woman
🔘 Dumb bitch
Looking for:
⚪️ Women
⚪️ Men
🔘 My keys that i had 2 seconds ago
— Adrianna 🍒👽 (@aydreezyy) February 12, 2019
3.
https://twitter.com/emmachamberlain/status/1100228364000849920
4.
Damn hitting a bong uses all four elements
— fairlady (@k0mikazi) November 16, 2018
5.
is my baby fat ever gonna leave or did it just turn into fat fat?
— queen quen (@quenblackwell) February 21, 2019
6.
your airport outfit is very important I don’t care what anyone says
— Shafeeq (@Y2SHAF) February 21, 2019
7.
when u drop ur charger down the side of the bed in the dark pic.twitter.com/BzBYYc5aGV
— R U B Y ♡ R Ø S E (@rubexcubex) February 18, 2019
8.
Getting touched during heads up seven up was the last time i felt something
— jp (@excesstential) February 20, 2019
9.
i am:
⚪️ gay
⚪️ straight
⚪️ bisexual
⚪️ asexual
🔘 annoyed at people who tell me to stop bouncing my leg because it’s a distraction for them or because it bothers them— i’m sorry you don’t have anxiety susan, stop fucking judging me and let me be internally anxious in peace
— leen :pp (@insaneasyIums) February 18, 2019
10.
Does anyone actually know what you're suppose to do when people are singing happy birthday to you
— Kyle (@kkunta__) February 18, 2019
11.
everytime the law & order theme song comes on pic.twitter.com/2Lg5fVrsUE
— Meech (@DemetriusHarmon) February 19, 2019
12.
what if u spelled jeff like jephph
— dirt prince (@pant_leg) March 31, 2018
13.
what if u cracked ur knuckles and ur fingers started to glow like glow sticks
— Shóna Kelly (@shonakellyx3) November 28, 2018
14.
do u ever wanna take a nap but the nap doesn’t wanna take u
— 🥀neyda🥀 (@wolfyneyda) April 6, 2018
15.
THIS ONE pic.twitter.com/kohxQsQXiX
— 𝒥𝒶𝓌𝓁𝑒𝑒𝓎𝓊𝒽 (@gothmoth69) December 18, 2019
16.
Remember how in EASY A Emma Stone's parents were Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson and all anyone wanted was a saucy bedroom romp about THEM or maybe that was just me?
— your friend, Drac-Yule-Log (@Remember_Sarah) February 14, 2019
17.
Today’s tea:
) ) )
) ( ) )
_(___(____)____(___(__ _
you don’t hate /
Nickelback / |
you just do /____|
as your /
told /
___________/— Edgar Momplaisir (@edgarmomplaisir) February 13, 2019
18.
I feel like a lot of people are 23 for many many years and then suddenly they are 30 does this make sense?
— Rachel Wenitsky (@RachelWenitsky) February 13, 2019
19.
https://twitter.com/gaddy_alex/status/1095078912365903878
20.
Me showing my therapist my inner demons for the first time. pic.twitter.com/x34BA2cvBF
— Thatguy Chris D (@thatguyCD) February 6, 2019
21.
bitches take their laptops and notebooks to coffee shops and get no work done while acting like they’re in an indie movie. i’m bitches.
— sayna .*ೃ (@OCEANGlRL) February 11, 2019