Dan Wilbur
Joe Biden is officially the President of the United States of America. People are excited. Also, they have some extremely funny ideas for what his first act as president should be.
There are 17 Executive Orders that President Biden will sign today. They include ending the “Muslim travel ban” and rejoining the Paris Climate Accords. But what should he be doing? He should be out there saying “Will you shut up, man?” to the mean people. He should be playing with his dog in The White House and taking pictures of it.
In short, he should be doing silly stuff so we don’t get bored. We just got through four years of the most rage-inducing news cycles. Spice it up, Joe!
Here are the funny ideas Twitter had about Joe Biden’s first order of business as president:
1.
Biden’s first act as president is finding everywhere it says “Donald Trump” in the White House and writing “SUCKS” after it.
— Matthew Broussard (@mondaypunday) January 20, 2021
2.
Biden’s first act as potus is to issue a full pardon to Chris Gaines
— Katie Notopoulos (@katienotopoulos) January 20, 2021
3.
Breaking News from the White House: Joe Biden’s first act as president is reinstating Vans Warped Tour by next year.
— gods favourite emo (new account) (@yasminesummanx) January 20, 2021
4.
BIDEN’S FIRST ACT AS PRESIDENT-ELECT IS TO GO TO GOD’S HOUSE TO KILL HIM https://t.co/9IUglXwRh8
— Matt Negrin, HOST OF HARDBALL AT 7PM ON MSNBC (@MattNegrin) November 8, 2020
5.
The first thing Biden should do is Tweet
— Justin Gonzalez🐝 (@jgonz0123) January 20, 2021
6.
The first thing Biden should do upon moving in the White House is cleansing it with sage.
— Alexandra Orr (birdie) (@BirdientheBees) January 20, 2021
7.
In Biden’s first act of leadership on covid, he has thrown an inauguration so boring it will inspire zero parties
— Rachel McCartney (@RachelMComedy) January 20, 2021
8.
Biden’s first act is to rehire the lawnmower kid.
— CalmTomb (@CalmTomb) January 20, 2021
9.
wow crazy that Biden’s first act in office was pardoning joe exotic
— Tyler Glaiel (@TylerGlaiel) January 20, 2021
10.
Joe Biden’s first act as president is to replace USA’s national anthem with ‘ I Want It That Way ‘ by @backstreetboys pic.twitter.com/ggYGgvveNa
— THEBSBArmy (@THEBSBArmy) January 20, 2021
11.
Biden’s first act as president: make Gritty the United States mascot
— Minka (@Minkatb17) January 20, 2021
12.
I think Joe Biden’s first act in office should be to outlaw all new streaming services.
— J’ladimir Robinette Lenin (@KCGooner) January 19, 2021
13.
President Biden’s first act should be to return Twitter to a 140 character limit for everybody.
— Scotch Hall (@steelthistweet) January 20, 2021
14.
Biden’s first act as President will be to ban couples from ‘pranking’ each other on TikTok.
— Van der What (@VanDerWhat) January 19, 2021
15.
joe biden’s first act as president is to replace the national anthem with “gimme more” by britney spears pic.twitter.com/SiRgxA6HzB
— joseph (@heIIobritney) January 20, 2021
16.
Since Trump refused, Biden’s first act should be to invite Obama over to give him an official tour of the White House.
— Frank Lesser (@sadmonsters) January 19, 2021
17.
Need Biden’s first act in office to be mandating the production of Paul Blart Mall Cop 3
— Bryce Henry (@brickwrestlehen) January 20, 2021
18.
Joe Biden’s first act as president will be to take a nap
— Collin McCreary (@cmac2211) January 20, 2021
19.
Biden’s first order of business should be changing the National Anthem to a sigh of relief.
— Andy Harris (@THEAndyHarris) January 19, 2021
20.
Biden’s first order in office should be to get the car warranty people to stop calling me
— Ahmad (@Frank_Sriracha_) January 18, 2021
21.
Joe Biden’s first order of business as President: Finding that yo-yo he lost in the Oval Office 4 years ago
— Joe Schmageggy (@JoeSchmageggy) January 20, 2021
22.
I know it goes against the healing and the unity but Joe Biden’s first act as president should be to mandate that all Secret Service agents can use Javanka’s bathroom
— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) January 14, 2021
23.
Joe Biden’s first order of business will be to “go to the Paris Climate uh Change and sign up for it. Because we’re allies. It’s the truth and scientists all over the world- all over the world want the United States to say stop it. We will win. Together. Stop the weather!”
— Dan Wilbur (@DanWilbur) March 4, 2020
24.
i had a dream it was biden’s first day and i was in charge of wiping the covid off of his desk but he never sat at his desk, he sat under it and watched old college football games on tv and i kept yelling at him. so i guess the magic number of tylenol before bed is three.
— shalewa sharpe (@silkyjumbo) January 15, 2021
Congrats, Mr. President! Get to work!
