AskReddit

Women Share The “Dumbest Thing” A Guy Has Said To Them After Sex (20 Posts)

11. 

“Cuddling in the afterglow, him gazing adoringly at my nude body…whispers…’I’ve just never seen boobs as small as yours.'” — MissPlaceDApostrophe

12. 

“Nothing, he just started playing League of Legends.” — lowkey-scared

13. 

“‘Whoopsie daisy!’ After he finished too quickly.” — queenofallyourdreams

14. 

“His window was open during the deed & when we got done he closed it and said ‘I really hope someone heard that.'” — moosegirl32

15. 

“I was cuddling a guy after sex one time and he told me he was ‘leaking testosterone all over me.'” — d3646262

16. 

“My ex-boyfriend said to me during our first and only sexual encounter ‘shit my stepdad’s home!’ Before he ran to his en-suite bathroom to hide. He left me lying there naked and really pissed.” — 4ensicmess

17. 

“Dude tried to give me a compliment by saying you have ‘plumpy pussylips.’ Dude did not realise that was borderline weird to say I started laughing.” — soggypapad

18. 

“Would you believe me if I said I actually enjoyed spending time with you?” — nolaexpat

19. 

“Wow I love my boyfriend but he says the dumbest stuff, especially right after sex. Highlights include: ‘You feel so dense right now. I’ve never felt more like there’s a man lying on me,’ ‘I have so many thoughts running through my head right now. I wish I’d learned more yo-yo tricks,’ and when I told him to stop playing with my nipple: ‘just imagine my finger is a tiny zamboni.'” — Tasty_Ice

20. 

“‘Are you a lesbian?’ Got asked this from a FWB since I did not cum and he thought of himself as a sex god so that was his logical conclusion.” — Noen92

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Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.