Redditor GamerGurl3980 shared a “mind-blowing” experience she recently had on a first date to the subReddit r/TwoXChromosomes.
She wrote, “So I’ve (21F) been getting back into dating lately. I met this one guy (27M) off Bumble and we hit it off. We went on our first date on Thursday. We spent like 4-5 hours together, getting to know each other and such. Those 4-5 hours were great!”
The Redditor continued to explain that they later went to a restaurant and ordered drinks.
She had planned on waiting to use the bathroom until she got home from the date but couldn’t wait any longer.
“I didn’t trust him enough to leave my drink unattended (because duh, it was our first time meeting). I tried to cover it with my cloth napkin but obviously – that wouldn’t stop him if he tried to drug me,” she continued.
Her date noticed the napkin gesture and asked the waiter, “Hey, it’s our first date. Can you take her drinks and hold them while she goes to the bathroom and bring them back when she gets back?”
Substances used to spike drinks often go undetected, many times they can be colorless and odorless. This coercive and controlling behavior leaves the victims susceptible to rape and assault, or violence and incapacitation. According to reports, 80% of the victims of drink-spiking cases reported in the US identify as women.
The Redditor exclaimed in her post, “WHEN I TELL YOU IN MY HEAD MY JAW DROPPED!!!! I have NEVER had a guy do that for me before or I’ve never heard of any guy doing that with any woman before! I know some of you are probably thinking “That’s the bare minimum.” Well, he went out of his way to ask the waiter to HOLD MY DRINKS to assure me that I would be safe with him. That was amazing to me personally.”
She does make a point here… men who are allies can duplicate this action for the “bare minimum.”
Ladies, never leave your drinks alone and don’t share drinks EVER, even with people you trust. Bring your drink with you when you go to the bathroom.
The Redditor updated her post to report that the pair continued to date but found that they had different priorities in life and weren’t compatible.
The bartender who wrote this story is happy to report that they’d be more than willing to perform this action for anyone who asked for it.
If you or someone you know has been assaulted or raped while on a date, please contact RAINN, the sexual assault hotline that provides 100% confidential support 24/7. Chat online at online.rainn.org, or call 800-656-4673.